I’m hoping you can all learn from my fuck-ups. And no, I don’t mean the recent relationship that ended really badly. Well, not the relationship part.
As I’m spending a bunch of time deleting content and figuring out how to keep other content away from the wrong eyes, it occurred to me that I, Ann St. Vincent, could provide a list of “what not to do” to keep your blogging content away from some of the people in your life.
Some of this also applies to you as a reader. You’d probably be surprised to know what I can learn about you when you engage on a blog.
Some of it may be obvious, but I thought I was safe and I wasn’t. Here goes: Continue reading →
What a crazy shit show the past few weeks have been.
As angry as I am that Fox betrayed my trust and violated my privacy, for what turned out to be for most of our relationship, it’s alright, ultimately. I learned things about him that may otherwise have taken a long time to uncover.
I don’t regret anything I’ve written; but I do realize I’m sometimes punchy with my comments and sure, cavalier in moments. It wasn’t quite accurate to say he doesn’t interest me on any level, for example.
But I stand behind every single thing I’ve said and done. If I had the chance to do it all again, I would still not have told him everything about Tony. I didn’t cheat on Fox, and I didn’t want to tell him anything that would hurt him unnecessarily. If it was me, I sure as hell wouldn’t want to know that the person who came before me had the best chemistry ever with my boyfriend. No way. Continue reading →
As you may have read a little over 12 hours ago, I was set to meet Fox this morning to give him his stuff (at his request). Pyjamas, a sweater, a KISS t-shirt, theater tickets. I included a little gift I’d bought for Maria when I was away.
He had requested there be no “scene”. He wanted it to be very transactional – here’s your bag, here’s your book, goodbye.
A week ago, I told Fox I needed space and time to think. At the time, I told him he’d forced my hand: had he not freaked out, I would have been relaxing into our relationship, giving it time, and sorting my head out.
But since he broke up with me, betrayed my trust, and said some pretty shitty things in the process, I wasn’t about to get back together when I was unsure.
I told him that last week in our long phone call. I don’t want to get back together with him just to continue to have doubts, and then break up with him. If I’m going to take him back, then I need to know I’m choosing him, every single day. Continue reading →
First of all, thank you to all of you who have reached out to me offline to see how I’m doing. It’s been a rough 10 days and I appreciate all of the support. It’s been especially amazing to hear from those of you who don’t comment normally; maybe I should password protect posts more often!
All of the breakup conversation had happened via text; hence the whole story (other than my internal dialogue) can be told in those four posts.
The only exception was a brief and crackly voicemail Fox left me on Sunday afternoon which said (as far as I could tell) “Ann, I love you…I’m so sorry.”
I told him I needed time to think, but on Monday midday he texted to ask if there was “any point to talking and meeting”. I said: Continue reading →
I made my blog public again. Fox and I had a long conversation yesterday and I believe he will not read this blog again; he knows how badly he messed up in that regard. I will write more about our conversation in the next day or two.
If you missed all the drama, start with this post.
For now I will password protect the four breakup text message posts. Just in case he does come back to visit. If you aren’t Fox, feel free to email me (via my Contact Me page) and ask for the password. Easy peasy.
We aren’t back together. But I haven’t said goodbye forever, either.
If you found this link looking how to make one a sex toy, keep reading. If you’re also curious how a divorced, over 40 year-old Mom got to this place, making sex toys from reciprocating saws? You may be interested in reading more of my blog. Check out my home page or go to About Me to read my story. Enjoy!
I’m starting to think perhaps I have a real problem. I am out of my mind with sexual desire. And the good-but-not-always-amazing sex with Tony just stokes an already out of control forest fire.
Several months ago I read a fellow bloggers post about making a sex toy, and I wanted to do it. And not just any sex toy. A fucking machine, basically. The day I read his post I bought a critical attachment off Amazon for $7 USD.