Shortly after my split, I got a tattoo to remind me to live a life of no regrets. It’s highly visible and I’ve used it at times to help make that “oh just go for it” decision. My decisions are all mine now; I don’t want to look back years from now and think “if only…”, especially when it comes to a pickup.
You know those moments where you see someone who sends electric shocks through your body, yet you let them pass by without a word spoken? I remember every time it happened to me, and decided I’d do my best to never let it happen again. I don’t want to have “missed connections” anymore. Continue reading →
I broke up with Leo three nights ago. I’d been writing about how I felt about him and doing my usual processing of things. I’d spoken to my Mom earlier in the week and decided I’d just see how things played out. There was no “burning platform” to break up. No crazy blog-finding (Fox) or police action (HWSNBN) or wives who found out about a relationship (Tony).
I decided to see how the next few weeks went, now that I’m finally relatively physically mobile and we could have more active dates. It had been 5 weeks without any Tony contact and I was working my way through that.
Thanks to the reader who sent me an email about this, or I wouldn’t have known.
Yesterday, I looked at some of my draft posts, including those about the man I refer to as “He Who Shall Not Be Named” (HWSNBN). I took all of the posts off the blog after some nasty shit went down between us that culminated in the police getting involved.
Anyway, I read one such post, called Intimacy with friends and lovers, and noticed it had some passages quite similar to what I’ve been writing about Leo. I decided to put the post back into “published” status, and did so on my phone, not realizing some of you would get that post via email.
So to any of you who read that post thinking it was about Leo, it wasn’t. Apologies!
Oh, and I also seem to have posted my last post (It’s not him, it’s me. Or is it?) with the wrong time, so not sure it showed up in anyone’s feed. Not my day, I guess.
We texted a bit about what brought me to town. I told him I debated whether to leave him that message and worried he’d think I was a crazy person. He said “Well I don’t think you are crazy at all. You are pretty cool doing that and I have to say right when I heard your message I remembered you instantly!”
I took that as a good sign, so I said:
I was hoping you would! In the moment I thought if I said something flirty you’d think I was just trying to get out of the ticket.
Him: Yeah, I would have thought that. What are your plans today? I think I may have lost your ticket; you should give me your copy so I can destroy it too then.
Oh my goodness. He’s asking to meet, basically. He knows I have a kid. What the fuck do I do? Back to the “only live once” philosophy. I didn’t think anything would really come of my message. But, it did. I explained we had afternoon and dinner plans but were free in the morning. Before I knew it he was offering to come by and say hi. We joked about it being a bit weird – that I didn’t want to seem too forward (yeah, try not to fall off your chair laughing with that one) or him too creepy. He was a fucking cop for crying out loud. On duty, which meant he’d be in uniform. Continue reading →
One day on my vacation with my son, on our way to a destination, I got pulled over for speeding. It was a speed trap of sorts, where the limit goes down significantly due to construction, the police kindly sitting just after the limit goes down and picking us all off with radar, one by one. Of course there were signs, but I was somewhat distracted by the GPS, figuring out which exit to take, etcetera. I had no idea I was speeding.
One policeman gestures where I’m supposed to go. As I pull up I switch my sunglasses for my glasses and take out my drivers license, ready to hand it to the officer. The next thing I know, I’m looking up at a very handsome man. In uniform. With a hat that reminds me of New York State Troopers. He’s smiling at me and says “nice watch”. Continue reading →