My third first date in three nights; finally, a kiss.

I had three first dates three days in a row last week. The first was the Accountant, the second was the check box man, and the third was, well… Mr Fetlife. I’m not sure I want to give them names unless we go on a second date.

Mr Fetlife reached out to me on Fetlife (obviously) shortly after I reactivated my profile during my three week break from Tony. The Saturday morning where I thought life was once again full of rainbows and unicorns, and Tony was going to finally make the effort I needed, I went onto Fetlife, changed my profile status from “single” to “in a relationship”, and updated my description to state I wasn’t looking to play alone, but perhaps I would explore with my partner.

As you know by now, that was short lived. In that happy time span however, I had told Mr Fetlife I was now off them market. And then I humbly told him I was back on the market.

Mr Fetlife is single and kinky. He works in construction, is 6 feet tall, and swarthy. He’s had long term relationships but never been married. He’s polite, consistent, and funny. He has no kids. He’s looking for a relationship. Continue reading

A unicorn walks into a swingers club…3

Part One | Part Two

Dale helped me get situated by the deck. It was the three of us and one other couple. Everyone else has taken a break to go eat, before the real party started. One couple left saying they were going to try out the swing in the dungeon. Advice was shared on which end to put your ass.

I was mesmerized by Lisa’s breasts – also enhanced – as they bobbed as she talked. I didn’t find her particularly attractive overall (and yes, I have found a few women attractive over the years) but in some ways, it helped me be more comfortable. I wasn’t intimidated at all. She was, overall, rather normal.

I was constantly struck by the incongruous situation. The two naked couples were talking about their favourite camping spots, and we could have been anywhere. But given where we were, and the fact that everyone was naked (except me, with my boring black bathing suit bottom) the discussion turned to some questions on the practical challenges of being “in the lifestyle” and having sex in a camper. Because, of course, camper walls are paper thin and the whole thing moves when you are having sex.

Continue reading

Who needs dating sites? Or, how I went to a swingers club within a week of being single.

Fluid loss was the theme of last week.

I can’t believe it’s only been seven days since I broke it off with Tony. It feels like forever and I miss him so much. All these little things remind me of him, and my first instinct is to text or call him – but I don’t. I have held true to my self-imposed no contact promise, both in spirit and letter.

A close friend gently told me he’s gone forever; the reality is if he wanted me, he would figure it out. I can come up with all kinds of rationalizations for his behaviour, but I know deep down it’s true. Regardless, there’s a part of me that so badly hopes its not true. Hoping there is a happy and romantic ending. I guess I’m not 100% cynic.

I have managed to stay off the dating sites. But before I claim any kind of moral victory, the truth is I haven’t needed them to interact with men. Continue reading

Crying and squirting in the same night: my fluid loss. 

When I wrote my last post, the one about Shenanigans, I was sitting at my kitchen island, crying, having a personal pity party. I had come home from time with a work colleague who is turning into a friend. She had taken me out for dinner and we’d had cocktails, shared a bottle of wine, and ate what she called “obviously we aren’t trying to pick up” food because it was deep fried and plenteous. It had been a fun night.

I was fine when I was out, surrounded by people. But home alone in a quiet house, the noise in my head telling me how much I missed Tony was impossible to block out.

I didn’t need any more alcohol. It was too early for me to go to bed. I was filling my time writing my post and discussing Tony and Mr. Tinder via text. I hadn’t heard from Tinder since I sent a thank you note after our date the night before. He had asked me what I was doing this night and said he would come over after our respective engagements, to f*ck me.  Continue reading

Real friends share their Tinder matches.

Madeline (aka The Woman Invisible) and I are friends. We met through our blogs, have met in person, text regularly, and talk on the phone in times of need.

But you know how to really know when a straight same-sex friend is a true friend? When they pass off a Tinder match to you. On a recent Tinder binge, she was matched with a very hot guy who was visiting her city. She didn’t know he wasn’t from there at first. She didn’t end up hooking up with him, because they couldn’t quite make it work. Not for lack of trying.

Turns out, he lives in my city. Continue reading