The dirty poet.

The man who referred to himself as a poet peppered his texts with “you’re such a little sweetheart” and sunflower emojis. When we met at a downtown bar for an after-work drink, my first thought was he might be bisexual. He had that way about him.

He’s in his mid-fifties and after ending his 25-year marriage, he got a tattoo, a nipple ring, and earrings in both ears. He’s in the film industry in an artistic role.

When I departed that first date, he stayed seated on the barstool, we hugged and he gave me what I would call a quick peck on the lips. Later, he professed via text how excited that kiss got him. He said he felt a spark.

Huh?  Continue reading

dating rule breaker

Breaking rules like the dating badass I am.

Previous Post | Yes, I’m a rule breaker sometimes, even when the rules are my own. But this time, it paid off.

We had planned to go out – I wanted to take him to a great river walk a few minutes from my house. If we were getting along, I knew we would have dinner. And we’d already talked about our views on first date sex.

He was running a little behind and I was so nervous I started pacing. I was so hoping it was good in person because it had been lovely talking to him on the phone.

I’d wondered if he’d show up empty handed like so many men before him.  Continue reading

group sex

Part 2 of my MFMFM

Previous Post – Group Sex

Lewis was the next to arrive. He said despite waiting for Bobbie at his place, turns out she needed to come separately. She was parking her car.

When she arrived, I could tell she was nervous. She complimented me on my house and I got her a wine glass for the white she brought. I left her in my kitchen with Lewis and Charles and I went to talk to Todd on my balcony. Continue reading

MFMFM group sex

Just another MFMFM

If you told me 5 years ago I would have a night like last night, I would have said you’re insane.

I had anal sex for the first time at 18 (but never again for many years). I had two threesomes by my last year of College. My ex husband was the first to fist me, at 25. So while I’m not sure it’s all that rare (surveys about sex are notoriously unreliable) my point is I wasn’t entirely vanilla before my split.

But this seems to be a whole other level. 

Lewis introduced me to Todd the first time for a threesome. For last night’s adventure, Lewis brought a woman he’s played with twice. Todd invited another male friend, Charles.

Three very tall, very fit, handsome and hung black men. All happened to wear head-to-toe black. There was a lot of muscle and gorgeousness in my kitchen at the same time.

Due to Todd’s delayed flight and Lewis waiting for Bobbie, Charles was the first to arrive. I was completely disarmed by his handsomeness. So much so, I was giddy. I’m usually pretty chill but there was just something about him that set me off-balance. It was similar to when I first met Todd. Charles had a warm smile, an easygoing vibe, and was ridiculously easy on the eyes.

We got drinks and went outside to talk. He asked how I met Clark and Todd. He told me the only reason he said yes to Todd’s invitation was that both he and Clark spoke very highly of me, said I was awesome and had a “great energy”. He was big into that.

I told him I liked his energy too.

I said: “Ummm… before ‘all this’ starts I was hoping to ask if we could, um…”

He interjected “…Can you kiss me?” 

“Ah, no, that’s not what I was going to ask. But I like that idea… erm… I was going to ask if you’d like to see each other again?”

“Yes, absolutely.”

He gave me his business card and I put it on my fridge then went back outside to join him.

“Can I kiss you now?” I asked with a huge smile?

He answered by stepping forward, wrapping his arms around me and leaning in to touch his lips to mine.

And holy hannah, it was electric.

Whatever I had expected – a blunt instrument, for lack of a better term – turned out to be the precision of a Stradivarius. 

It was slow. The moment our lips touched we paused. There was no movement, only delicious anticipation, then an ever so slight increase of pressure. A small movement so more of our lips touched. A sigh. 

I was shocked. This was not the kiss of a guy focused solely on getting laid. 

We broke apart and both said “wow”. I may have giggled and asked to do it again. We did, and it could have been 5 minutes or 20.

“Yo A!” came the shout from my kitchen. It was Todd, making his presence known. Charles and I broke apart again and bounced (literally) into the house to give Todd a kiss.

It had begun.

It’s still good.

I haven’t had much to say that’s new this week. The death of my friend definitely had an impact – it’s hard to talk about the excitement of a relationship when I’m also in mourning.

But Jack and I are good. Really good. We learn more about each other with every conversation, and I like what I hear. He is appreciative of my patience with his schedule issues (but really, what kind of selfish asshole would make an issue of his regular hospital visits to a sick parent?) and with my desire to understand his quirks.

It’s not one-sided. He knows I like a couple of quick check-ins during the day (not mandatory but nice) and he’s doing it.  Continue reading

I took a new lover. 

My AFF profile was open for a few months last Summer and early Fall. It’s where I met Leo, as some of you may remember. I have zero recollection whether I met anyone else in person from that site – it’s funny how time erases some people and not others – but there was another man who tried and we simply couldn’t connect.

I never wrote about him, because I never met him. The last interaction was him asking me to meet one weekend morning for coffee, then when I agreed to the time and place he went silent. It was the second or third time it didn’t work due to his flakiness so when he reached out again, I scolded him and said no thank you.

That was enough for him to not try again. Until recently. Continue reading