I have no secrets now.

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Leo, you’re on Facebook but not other social media, why is that?”

“I’m not very active on Facebook, Ann. I figure those people who want to know about my life will pick up the phone.”

“Yeah, I get that. What do you think about people who share a lot online?”

“Well it all depends, I think it’s attention seeking sometimes which just isn’t me. Why do you ask?”

“Have you ever looked up my profile on Facebook?” Continue reading

I’m popular because I made a f*ck machine

I was playing around with Google Analytics today and doing some blog maintenance. While I knew “making a sex machine” and its derivatives is often one of the top searches that gets people to my blog, I didn’t realize how often.

Over 39,000 times – since I switched to self-hosted last Spring. I know that post gets around 120 hits a day, so seems right.

It’s funny – it drives my site traffic but not engagement. People don’t hang around and read my story – they are looking for instructions.

I re-read the post today and it still makes me giggle. Because really, it’s ridiculous. The box has sat under my bed since the time I tried it. The reciprocating saw hasn’t been used. Somehow I think if I tell Leo, he’ll try it.

Here’s the post link: Making my own f*ck machine.

Civility shouldn’t be rare. Or, why I almost cried twice in 24 hours.

I’m on a plane flying home from New York, where I’ve been the last several days. It was wonderful but I always look forward to getting home after too many nights in a hotel room. A breakfast of bacon, eggs, some toast and coffee should not cost $35 US.

I did not seek a debaucherous vacation, nor did debauchery find me anyway. As you know, sometimes it comes to you. I am however sporting four very large hickeys on the front of my neck, with no concealer to be found. But that’s not the reason I’m writing at the moment.

My level of patience and optimism with my dating life has been cyclical – right now I’m in a place where the lack of common decency shown by so many gets to me. It’s not just my experience, it’s those of my friends as well.  Continue reading

is meh better than nothing?

My busy week | Monday with Ian

It’s funny how moving past someone emotionally, ever so slightly, changes everything. Ian started out with decent potential even considering the distance. But his weird behavior on our third date (even now that I understand its cause) and his subsequent whining about not knowing what he wanted and what we’d do in September when he started to spend less time in the city was enough for me to move him from the “good potential” to “meh” box.

How different my reaction to him versus Kyle. I’m still not at “meh” with Kyle, but wish I was. Continue reading

keep your identity private, bloggers

It’s sexy to keep yourself safe.

I’m hoping you can all learn from my fuck-ups. And no, I don’t mean the recent relationship that ended really badly. Well, not the relationship part.

As I’m spending a bunch of time deleting content and figuring out how to keep other content away from the wrong eyes, it occurred to me that I, Ann St. Vincent, could provide a list of “what not to do” to keep your blogging content away from some of the people in your life.

Some of this also applies to you as a reader. You’d probably be surprised to know what I can learn about you when you engage on a blog.

Some of it may be obvious, but I thought I was safe and I wasn’t. Here goes: Continue reading

Top 100 Sex Blogs – Redux!!

You may remember my post a while back asking you to nominate your favorite sex blogs for Rori’s annual Top 100 Sex Bloggers list. Well, unfortunately she couldn’t finish the awards, but sex-blogging-superstar Molly has taken up the cause.

There are so many amazing blogs out there and Molly has been incredible to take over this list, so please read her post here and nominate your faves!!

Meeting the Grey Knight

This post is long overdue; but my world post-trip turned into a Fox shit show and I got completely sidetracked.

Some of you may follow the Grey Knight; a male blogger profiling the many dates and sexual escapades he’s had on his post-split dating journey.

Given the relatively rare number of male non-fiction dating / sex bloggers, I found him shortly after starting my own blog, and have read all of his posts since.  Continue reading

And… turns out I was violated multiple times.

As you may have read a little over 12 hours ago, I was set to meet Fox this morning to give him his stuff (at his request). Pyjamas, a sweater, a KISS t-shirt, theater tickets. I included a little gift I’d bought for Maria when I was away.

He had requested there be no “scene”. He wanted it to be very transactional – here’s your bag, here’s your book, goodbye.

Of course you know that’s not how it went down. Continue reading

Reblog: Being catfished. You’ll probably laugh at me.

I was doing some blog maintenance today (more fun than working) and came across a post that still makes me laugh – link below.

On a random note, I’ve been reading some dating stories from female bloggers recently and generally speaking, when they complain about a guy’s douchy behavior, I see all the red flags that got them there. Either in the way he treated them, or what he said, or what she did. But it’s rarely a surprise to me, based on what they write.

I’m sure there are exceptions, but it does make me wonder whether I should attempt to provide advice to people via this blog. I have never really thought I knew enough to do so. Madeline (The Woman Invisible) tells me I should quit my day job and become a dating therapist.

What do you think?

In the meantime, check out this old post: Hook Line & Busted: My Catfish Experience.

Ann
xo

An Introduction & Summation

I’ve made some great in-person friends through blogging, but this is the first time an in-person friend is making the jump to blogging.

I posted one of her stories here a while ago and many of you said you loved it.

I’d like to introduce my amazing friend, Madame. Please show her some bloggy love, visit her site, sign up as a reader, and enjoy. Continue reading