Clark wanted to get together on Sunday but I said no. Not for lack of physical desire (sex just stokes the internal fires), but I’d had my emotional fill of cock that week. He has been pursuing me, asking when we will see each other. He is single and keen for “good pussy” (Lewis’s words).
I’m seeing him on Monday along with Lewis. Maybe with a bonus (third!) dude and the woman from before. I’d be happy to have all three men at my own disposal but perhaps that makes me greedy. Fuck it, I don’t care.
I am seeing Jake on Friday. When in my latest “screw it I’m filling all my time with girlfriends” phase I booked time to see a close friend for dinner. Jake will come over afterwards in what I’m sure will be a repeat of our last date. I’m okay with that; we’ve discussed setting another date with more time together. Continue reading →
I’m going to write about the foursome I just experienced. But I want to first talk about some of the feelings and insecurity I had before it became a reality.
Today, I’m pretty confident both mentally and physically. The physical confidence has been a latecomer. In the last couple of years I’ve begun to embrace my generous ass, lack of thigh gap, and my cellulite.
But I found myself wondering whether there was more to it than that. So I asked, and we established he thought me to be gorgeous and he was interested in potentially playing with me more. If we were going to have penetrative sex, however, he needed to ask his wife and his girlfriend (he’s polyamorous) for permission.
Early last week he asked me if I planned to be at the sex / swingers club that Friday night. I actually had no plans on Friday night, so it was a possibility. He said he wanted to introduce me to his girlfriend and they would be there that night.
I added this feature image because I deliberately put a small pic of my bruises at the end of this post but it seems WordPress likes to make it a feature image, which I didn’t want. Don’t scroll down to the very bottom if you don’t want to see the bruise picture. I’ve offended some people, it seems. Again.
[Part One | Part Two]
I watched the woman writhe and moan under the Dom’s ministrations. It was startling to watch what he was doing, but I could tell he was very skilled. Soon afterwards they were finished, he helped her down off the cross (words I can’t say I ever thought I would write), people applauded, and off she went.
He came over to me. We laughed about meeting at the gangbang night without even realizing. We chatted as if I wasn’t standing in from of him almost naked and he didn’t have a whip in his hand. I asked him about his Prince Albert piercing…I’m admittedly, a little curious.
Then he asked me if I wanted to get on the cross. I must have looked terrified so he walked me over to the big bag he had on an ottoman and showed me a few things.
Knowing about my bad experience with the Dom at the gangbang night, he explained that in these situations, it’s the Sub that has all the power. He told me he would start slow and gentle and be constantly checking in with me to see how I was doing. He told me I could use three words – Yellow to say I was reaching my limit, Red to say I was at my limit, and a third word (unique to people from my area) which means stop immediately.
Jason led me by the hand to the play space. It was already filling up with couples and single men. Jason and the husband (we’ll just call him “H”) picked a platform bed. His wife (“W”) still hadn’t said anything but he said “oh, she likes you a lot”.
It was surreal.
H said “we usually like to start with massages; do you like massages?”
I really wished it was Jason’s hands on me. Throughout the next hour I would always know the second he touched me… I suppose after 18 months it makes sense. (And for anyone relatively new to this blog and wondering why Jason isn’t my boyfriend…he found out shortly after we started dating, in the Fall of 2013, that he had a 9 month old. His son lives with him now and he’s been slowly determining with the mother of his child whether they are going to get back together). Continue reading →
Monday I was able to end my three-week long sex dry spell with a hookup at a sex club. Tuesday night I had crazy-but-empty sex with Lewis and then realized there was no future with him as he had been slowly fading away. Then I had a great night on Wednesday night with Tony, and acknowledged despite how I feel about him, there was no near-term future with him either. Tony and I were planning to have our talk on Saturday night. It was tentative depending on how his work went.
Thursday night I got home, fussed online, and watched television. I had met a couple of interesting prospects on Plenty of Fish who seemed normal, mature, articulate, and keen to meet. They met or exceeded my guidelines. But with plans on Friday to have dinner with a girlfriend, a potential date on Saturday with Tony, and then getting my son Liam on Sunday for the week, it seemed it wasn’t going to work in the near term. Continue reading →
I love music. I choose it based on my mood. It is almost always playing in my house – even more so now that I have a new turntable and my Dad’s vinyl collection to discover.
The post about Andrew and that Bruno Mars song got me thinking. For some of the men who have crossed by path, there is a song I associate with them. Perhaps just for a short period of time, perhaps forever. Time will tell. The songs that remind me of Faraway Lover are still vivid memories of our time together – I’m starting to think that will never fade.
Here are the boys and their songs. If you don’t know their stories, go to my “Lovers” page. But please don’t pick apart every lyric and test the applicability…my brain doesn’t work that way.
Image Note…I did a google search for “awkward sex” and stumbled upon this truly horrifying tattoo. It made me think that awkward is all relative and therefore made me feel a bit better.
I do have some story threads I haven’t followed up on yet (namely the Italian, and some other December activity that was interesting) but I just haven’t been feeling it this week.
I have been feeling the pain of a fellow blogger and the bad treatment she’s been receiving, and it got me thinking about men who will pursue you like crazy and promise to meet, but then disappear when it comes time to make plans. There are also the men who disappear after a first date where you have sex with them.
I wish I could say I knew about men who I had first dates where I didn’t have sex with them, but there aren’t many. Granted, I’m almost certain I got second dates when I wanted them. I am not willing to say it’s a guarantee, but I’m definitely pondering. Continue reading →