i fucked a lot of guys this week

My busy week | Thurs Lewis & Fri Jake

Monday | Tuesday & Wednesday

Thursday was Lewis’s. The week prior we went to a formal event together (which was awesome) and he came over to my place afterwards to let off the sexual tension building all night. Before he left, we agreed to meet this past Thursday. He also promised to take me dancing at some point this summer and I hope that can happen. I would love to be on a darkened dance floor with him.

Thursday was just going to be the two of us, but at some point during the day when my phone pinged with a new text message I looked down to see: “Clark said he’s free too…”

Gulp. Continue reading

a squirting second date

A two-year wait for date #2

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Jake’s profile had appealed to me for a few reasons. It was well written and honest and had intellectual depth. He was tall and bulky and while not conventionally attractive I liked his look. Obviously, I liked that he’d followed up with me each time I came back online.

He asked me when I wanted him to come over with a bottle of wine. I told him I didn’t lead with sex anymore and perhaps we could go out for dinner. He was good with either but reminded me we’d already had sex and he knew we were both sexual people.

At some level I believed it wouldn’t make a difference with him. From the beginning, I think he was more like Jason and Andrew, where even if you have sex with them early they still see you as relationship material.

Continue reading

juggling multiple sexual partners

I had sex with 4 different men in 5 days

Monday was Ian.

Wednesday was Tony.

Thursday was Lewis.

Friday was Jake.

Four men in five days. I turned down Clark although he’d asked to see me on the weekend since he missed out on Thursday. How did I feel about it? Mostly powerful. Definitely slutty. Continue reading

i've filled my online dating dance card

My dance card is full again

Clark wanted to get together on Sunday but I said no. Not for lack of physical desire (sex just stokes the internal fires), but I’d had my emotional fill of cock that week. He has been pursuing me, asking when we will see each other. He is single and keen for “good pussy” (Lewis’s words).

I’m seeing him on Monday along with Lewis. Maybe with a bonus (third!) dude and the woman from before. I’d be happy to have all three men at my own disposal but perhaps that makes me greedy. Fuck it, I don’t care.

I am seeing Jake on Friday. When in my latest “screw it I’m filling all my time with girlfriends” phase I booked time to see a close friend for dinner. Jake will come over afterwards in what I’m sure will be a repeat of our last date. I’m okay with that; we’ve discussed setting another date with more time together. Continue reading

Doug the sailor, his wine, and his shag carpet

I didn’t want to delay meeting Doug (the sailor) because continuing a text and phone relationship before meeting face to face? We all know what can happen.

I’m in a very busy period of work right now, we are in the midst of technical deployments and coming up to a big deadline, so a Friday afternoon which was quiet was a perfect time. I took a half day vacation day and decided to meet Doug at the west end of our city where he docks his boat.

I had it all planned. Leave before my city’s notorious traffic kicked in, spend a couple hours with Doug, drive back into the Center of the city for dinner with a girlfriend at her place, then go home to meet Jake. Continue reading

Dinner, wine, and quality time with Jake

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I originally titled this post “Friday night was slutty even for me”, but in the grand scheme of things having sex with two men in the span of 6 hours isn’t the most extreme thing I’ve done. Not by a long shot.

In my car on the way to my girlfriends I called a blogging friend for a first-time phone call; it was a delightful way to spend the drive back into the center of the city.

My friend and I had a couple of hours together – she’d just come back from an amazing trip and regaled me with the stories. We ever so briefly touched on my pre- and post-dinner plans. She’s been dating the same man since shortly after I met Tony, so she’s comfortable in her year-long relationship and thankfully her dating chaos days are behind her. At least for the foreseeable future. Continue reading

A gorgeous Saturday afternoon, nothing but my thoughts.

Of course that’s not true; I’m with a girlfriend, her parents, and our three collective children. We are, quite literally, in the middle of nowhere. It’s been a night and day of sun, water, swimming, laughs, music, day drinking, and snacks.

I haven’t had any stories I’ve had the time to make a whole blog post but I thought I’d catch up on a few things (and people).

Work has been super busy. Evenings after putting Liam to bed, weekend monitoring of emails, and the like. We are really close to a big deadline and while it’s not gone super smoothly, so far the problems are all manageable. I was brought in to save it and I really hope I prove to have done so. Continue reading

Dating sucks

Date frustrations

I shut down my OK Cupid profile and my just-recently-opened Plenty of Fish profile. Bumble went down as well, after sending a note to just one man telling him I wasn’t unmatching him and giving him my number in case he wanted to reach out.

It’s not for lack of messages. If I only wanted to men to take me out for dinner or have sex I’d be golden. But I’m ultimately looking for a boyfriend. So as I’ve said for a long time now, I don’t engage with every man who comes along. And I don’t mind the bad, rude, crass, or simply inane opening messages. I don’t mind hearing from 21 year-olds who swear I’m the hottest thing they’ve seen. It’s just noise and sometimes the messages are amusing.

I wouldn’t even be in this mental place if I’d met some guys and went on some dates and it didn’t work out. I’m okay with either me or him deciding the right dating chemistry isn’t there between us.

But what I can’t stand is experiencing shitty and dismissive behavior over and over again. Don’t like me? Fine. But grow some fucking balls and exit gracefully. Continue reading

A little quiet time

The sound of silence. Kinda.

I deleted my dating profiles last week – maybe the week before – and so far I don’t miss them. I’ve had a few moments where I considered reopening them, wondering if my soul mate is one right swipe away, but they remain deleted.

I have also quite liked not being able to check the locations of anyone I’ve connected with. It brings no good to know these things. I unfriended Kyle on Facebook, with strong encouragement from Hy, and that’s been fine too. There was nothing in his profile of any interest, but the moment he posted something I could possibly interpret as bad for me, I would wish to not have seen it.

He hasn’t mentioned it; I doubt he’s noticed. I almost followed Drew on Instagram but resisted.  Continue reading

The elusive creature named Kyle

I think this might be a record for slowest relationship start – scratch that, since I don’t know if this is the start of anything whatsoever. The magic 8 ball aka my Mother says yes but this has not been an auspicious start.

This is the longest it’s taken me to have four dates with anyone. I don’t count Jake since we stopped after the first.

Dates isn’t even a great term. The first meeting was a pre clearance date. Then a dinner date, then a spontaneous late night discussion on my couch, and most recently, another couch conversation in lieu of what was supposed to be a date.

Three months from our first contact.  Continue reading