I do feel quieter, mentally. It’s all relative, I suppose. I still wake up with thoughts of lost friendship and lost potential, but it’s the exception, not the rule. I don’t miss online dating. I’d left one app on my phone called Inner Circle – it’s new-ish and proved to be completely useless: only two men in my city on the app over the age of 38, my height or more, with a college education and children. TWO.
If I removed the “children” requirement there were maybe twenty.
A 28 year-old tall handsome professional reached out to me. He said he loved older women and I seemed to be exactly his type. He was interesting and articulate and figured I had nothing to lose by responding. We texted back and forth for a week. He flaked on a date we’d booked for tonight and I didn’t care one bit.
I’m back to work tomorrow after an extended vacation. I don’t want to work; after the insanity of the Fall it was nice to be able to have a break. I’m excited about the work I’m doing these days but could easily have another two weeks away.
Today was a bit of a house disaster. We are in a deep freeze like most of the country; I woke up to no hot water. Managed to get it fixed. Then my dishwasher didn’t work. Thank goodness for the internet; got that fixed myself as well. Then my thermostat stopped working so there was no heat. That one took a little more work, but a trip to the hardware store, reading the manual, and using my drill and work gloves, got it all sorted out.
I don’t have Liam this coming week, so knew I wanted to see a few people. Before I knew it, I’d booked every night Monday through Friday with a different man. Hence, the post title.
Tomorrow I’m supposed to see Dan, but I now doubt it’s going to happen. He’s away in his hometown this weekend and texted me as he always does. But this time, late at night and perhaps fuelled by alcohol, he got back into asking me detailed questions about dating and sex.
He’d pestered me about Zane a while back. While normally I wouldn’t disclose that I’m dating anyone else, Dan seems to like to know. The weekend Zane and I went for dinner, Dan kept asking what I was doing that night until I finally relented and said I’d met someone and he was taking me for dinner.
Last night he wanted to know whether Zane had met Liam (no!), how many times I’d seen him, etcetera. He even asked about his cock size.
I’m pretty good about deflecting Dan when I don’t want to answer. I call him out on it – asking why he wants or feels he needs to know. Once he started suggesting he and I go to a sex club together, I laid out (again) why that wasn’t going to happen. We needed to be better bonded with each other, I thought he was messed up about sex (he left Christmas night without so much as a deep kiss, because he’d eaten too much), and trust is critically important.
I was texting him from the MacBook Pro he sold me. I’d asked him a few times to please just let me sleep. It was well after midnight. He then asked why I wasn’t answering my phone. It was face down and on silent on my nightstand. He’d called seven times in a row. I called him back, he wanted to know all kinds of specific details about things which I refused to answer. When I said “can I please go to sleep now” he hung up without saying goodbye.
So, I’m pretty pissed off and he may be as well; I haven’t received any text messages from him since.
Tuesday I’m seeing Lewis for a standard drink, work talk, and fuck.
Wednesday I’m taking Zane to the symphony. He’s never been. I think something has shifted for him – perhaps as a result of our “children” talk. For a guy who said he wanted to see me multiple times a week if we were dating, he’s been rather quiet.
I’m okay with it. I’m not pushing anything because I don’t know what I want. He said he wanted me to text him more; although he doesn’t send good morning or evening texts, he wanted me to. I’m sure that’s a surprise to many of you. I explained I was letting him set the pace of texting because if a woman texts more than a guy does, they take it the wrong way. His response? “Yeah, you’re right… the truth is hard to swallow.”
I think he’s used to being pursued.
Thursday I’m seeing Tony. Ever since telling me about the divorce, he’s been more flirty. I have some questions, and I want to tell him he doesn’t get a free pass back into my life like nothing happened.
Friday I’m seeing the contractor, who I know I’ve written about but never named. We had such a great first date and then he proved to not be ready, just like Bruce. He’s in the midst of sorting out a divorce with his ex-wife, and its ugly.
He doesn’t text much, and every time I delete our text history from my phone he pops up a week or two later. It happened again today. He helped me with a few house questions and kept me laughing. He invited me over and I said no, I had to get mentally ready for work.
But we set a date for Friday.
So yes, in theory, I could have a date with a different guy every weekday night this week. It’s an anomaly. I’d bet Dan won’t follow up, Tony will flake, and something will happen with the Contractor’s kids.
But it still made me laugh that even in my quiet times, I manage to have a (theoretically) fully booked week.