A reminder, you can always check out my “men in the mix” page to get the latest on the men I’m writing about. It’s all spoilers, all the time!
John drove me home, we parked his car and I invited him into my house. In my kitchen, as I poured him a drink, he went for it. Arms around me, mouth on the back of my neck, pushing me up against my kitchen counter.
I discovered this man in his late 50s had the libido of a 20-year-old. We got pretty heated on my main floor and I decided what the hell, I’d take him upstairs.
The sex was fun and plentiful. He would have to stop for a break, but then he’d be able to hard again. He never came. He was good with his hands and his mouth and his cock was nice and thick.
I was happy to be with someone who seemed mature, successful, kind, confident, and intelligent, who shared my high libido and was into me.
He stayed the night. We started the next morning with sex. He told me he “like liked” me, which I thought was sweet but a little presumptuous. But given the night we had, I chalked it up to his losing himself in the excitement of the new and the hope for potential.
The contractor was supposed to go to a sporting event with me that night, but he had to go out of the city to help a parent with an issue at their house. I debated who to ask and decided I would ask the man next to me in my bed.
We joked we should count our date as two, given how long it lasted. And we would have our third that night.
There were some great moments. While I wrapped up some work, he sat on my couch and tuned the guitar my son is using for lessons at his school. He played two of my favorite songs – without knowing they were my favorites. It all felt very comfortable.
It was nice to be with him, but over the course of the day I started to learn and experience some things that had my spidey senses tingling. First, he wasn’t currently working in his profession. He’d had a series of sales jobs recently – at a hardware store and a car dealership, but had no job at present. While I can of course date someone between jobs, it seemed odd to me that someone who seemed so successful wasn’t able to find work in his long-time industry. There was some reason, I just didn’t know it yet.
Then I learned he was living with his sister and her husband. When he moved out post-split two years prior, he moved in with his sister. So he didn’t have his own place. Again, if it was temporary I could understand, but this seemed odd to me. It also meant I would never be able to go to his place; I would always be hosting.
He reminded me of my father. Now, I like my father, but I don’t want to date him. Some of John’s expressions and way of speaking were exactly like my dad. It was off-putting – not something he could help, but I didn’t like it.
But most importantly was how he handled being in “like like” with me. He asked me whether I was seeing other people. He asked that I not see other people. I blanched at the request and he asked if I’d be willing to “give it a week” – I did a mental calculation of the chance that I’d see anyone else in the next week. Since there wasn’t, I was okay to agree.
I was clear with John I thought it too early to have that kind of discussion, or for him to ask for exclusivity. I told him I’d had no good experiences when someone wanted to “lock things down” so early. He didn’t seem like HWSNBN but I learned from that experience that that kind of intensity has a downside as well.
We shared popcorn at the game and I was mildly repulsed by how he ate it – like my son, like he couldn’t get enough, spilling everywhere. I can chastise a child, but a man who is almost 60?
As chill as I can be, one of my pet peeves is lack of social graces and what I consider uncouth behavior. Like grabbing fistfuls of popcorn and jamming them in your mouth. Or being handed a glass of wine and drinking the whole thing in less than 3 minutes. And unfortunately, John did more than a few of those things. It’s a total lady boner killer for me. I fight my response because I think it’s judgey, but it still happens.
He stayed overnight again, we had a great night of sex that included fisting and anal – and then I went to work on Monday morning well fucked and happy to have met someone new. But the feeling didn’t last.