This isn’t something that just happened, but I haven’t had a chance to write about it and figured some levity might be a good thing for me right now.
WAY back when I first started dating, and acted like a crazy woman when someone disappeared (just read about the Cook to see an example), there was a guy who I met for one date and then he gradually disappeared, but not before he also continued to reach out to a close friend of mine online.
I lost my shit. I literally cringe when I read the post, but go read it and then come back. I’ll wait.
Two funny things have happened since with this guy.
First, when I went back online after Fox, he reached out to me on one of the dating sites I was on. I was really shocked – if the tables were turned I wouldn’t come anywhere near someone who acted so batshit crazy.
I don’t think he remembers how nuts I went. We had a short dialogue and I didn’t take the bait so he just wished me well.
Months later he reached out to me on a swingers site I have a profile on. I’ve been barely active there for months, and just occasionally respond to messages. I don’t have a picture of my face, so he didn’t know it was me. He said:
Just wanted to pop by and say hello. Lovely profile. I hope that your week has been going well. You’ve got such a wonderful energy.
The only reason I bothered to sign on to the website and respond is because I saw the profile name was very similar to the one he used on the dating site. I wanted to see if it was him, and it was.
So I responded with a little personal information about me and suggested perhaps we had met before. It was indeed him and he had no idea it was me.
Curiosity got the better of me so I gave him my mobile number. He wanted to immediately switch to a phone conversation but I had no interest. We’ve texted a little bit and turns out he’s been exploring being with couples, but he wants to find a partner for sex club action.
I’m not so interested this time. Despite my being batshit crazy the last time, I’m not so keen on spending any time with a man who clearly had so little interest in me he didn’t want a second date.
I told him I thought it funny he wasn’t interested in me after our first date but subsequently reached out. He says what he remembered is I didn’t seem interested in anything physical with him or a physical relationship.
Which is even more funny, because at the time, what he said to me was he wasn’t “romantically interested” in me after our date. Having a blog and saving text exchanges is handy in times like these!
I didn’t want to bother getting into it with him, so just said it was quite the contrary; at the time, I wasn’t interested in a relationship.
I like the symmetry of these experiences, and it reinforces for me that so much of what happens is dependent on the timing (I’ve written before about how critical timing is). Because this guy obviously likes something in my profiles – he’s now reached out three times. Who knows what it really was the first time – maybe he truly wasn’t into me, maybe there was someone else. It doesn’t matter.
But he’s not going to get the opportunity to know what it’s like to be with me.
Image source: Wikipedia, Night of the Living Dead