Shenanigans returns and curiosity gets the better of me.

Some of you may remember the man I call Shenanigans. You can start his story here if you haven’t read it before.

I sum him up on my lovers page thusly: 30 year-old super tall, super hot, great cock, great sex, total shenanigans trying to meet and communicate with him. Complete selfish asshole who made me question every time whether it was worth it. Our relationship ended with him texting me “blow me” in anger, not passion. But he keeps coming back for a chat.

The last time I saw him was in December 2014, right before I met Tony. It was the first time I’d seen him in 10 months; we had dinner and I let him cum on my face. (I find it funny that the post gets found regularly by people searching the internet for cumming on a woman’s face. Nice.)

I never spoke to him after that date, nor did I particularly care to. He texted me a few times in the past nine months but it rarely amounted to anything remotely interesting enough for this blog.

Until last week.

I will preface this text exchange by saying I had ZERO interest in seeing him. I responded to him only because I was curious what he would say and if his pattern would repeat. I also know his triggers so in a few places responded more positively than I feel because I knew he would then continue the conversation with me.

I keep wondering if some day he’ll be in a serious relationship. I’m curious to know what happens to him long-term…his insecurities, bravado, and patterns are so clear to me at this point, but he seems oblivious to them. Yet he thinks he is self-aware. It’s fascinating to me.

Said another way, if he texts me in five years I would respond just to see if he’s changed at all. My intellectual curiosity sometimes gets the better of me.

A little bit of cat and mouse, I suppose.

I told Fox all about this exchange. He suggested that despite my being pretty damn clear about my status and not seeing Shenanigans, that the sheer fact I responded would give him hope. I do see his point.

My responses are on the right in italics. Later in the text exchange my response time considerably slowed and you can see how he responded.





       Why hello, S.

What’s new

       Work, life, the usual.


who are you dating these days?

       Someone awesome. You?

Is it serious? And exclusive?

       Getting serious and yes, exclusive.


Where’d u meet him

              Online: POF.


       7 years older than me

So if you saw me are you cheating on him?


Do I still turn you on?

What kind of question is that? Yes I’m sure if I was to see you again of course you would.


Do you have feelings for him

Of course I do. I wouldn’t be dating him if I didn’t and certainly wouldn’t be exclusive.


How long u been seeing him?

Few months

When’s ur next date with him

What do you think of a glass of wine with me sometime soon?

S, I’m in an exclusive relationship with someone.

Nothing is going to happen between us; why would you want to meet?

Because I want to see you. Don’t tell anyone

I’m not one for deception.

I want you to keep it between us.

And I want you to wear a pencil skirt and heels for me one night soon

I’m flattered; thank you. But I’m not hooking up with you at this point.

Just a drink and a chat. We had a nice time last winter

Yes we did; and I was single at the time.

Well. I know you want to see me

I’m quite content in this relationship. The timing just isn’t right to see you.

oh really

Yes, really.

Do you want to see me though?

I’m not interested in seeing anyone else right now.

Do you like my body more than his?

I’m not having that conversation S.

What would it take for you to have that conversation with me now?

I’m very curious to have a certain convo with you at the moment.

Okay you can ask.

But I’m not meeting you or discussing you vs. my boyfriend or any such nonsense.

What would it take for you to meet me?

Being single.

Tell me what I could do to make it happen

Necessary first condition. Nothing you can do, sorry.

There must be a way to convince you

No there’s not, sorry. When I’m exclusive with someone I mean it.

A bottle of wine from me, for us?

       What did you want to ask me about?

Ah, so you like the wine idea..

       No. I was trying to change the subject.

I’m asking you what I want to ask you.

Then later ill proceed with something else depending. Lol

 So when you said “I’m very curious to have a certain convo with you at the moment…”

That conversation was trying to convince me to see you?

No its a follow up. After I convince you

       Well you won’t. So you can ask over text if you really want to ask.

Can I bring you a bottle of wine?

       Please stop asking. My answer isn’t going to change.

You just said I can ask lol. Okay you seem pretty firm. I’m surprised

Your conversation question. Not trying to see me.

If you’re surprised then you don’t know me all that well.

I don’t want to talk to you if this is going nowhere

       Okay then.


If you change your mind and want to see this tall handsome boy let me know

I’d ask that you consider a sit down chat with me so that we can have that conversation…

If you are so curious.

We’ll keep it between us

Because I am very curious to see you face to face

       This isn’t about whether we “keep it between us”. Why so curious?

What could be so important you have to tell me or ask me.

Re-read our texts.. it’s nothing overly serious

I was just going to continue with a certain topic but you weren’t co-operating last night.

So I’m wondering if you’d be more co-operative in person

An interesting topic nonetheless

Curious because we haven’t met in a long time

Are you curious?

       About the topic you want to discuss?

Yes and about me in general at the moment

Mildly. Although every other time you’ve wanted to discuss something it’s been one of a few topics.

You won’t tell him that a guy I saw previously started texting me right?

       I probably will mention it. Hadn’t thought about it.



Other thoughts?

Actually don’t mention it

Why are you curious about me?

       You’re the one that said I should be.

Are you?

I didn’t say that

But yes you should be curious about a few things, like what we would discuss

But you seem to be

Let me know what you’re thinking of me



I’m not going to see you sorry.

Are you sure

       Yes. I said so yesterday as well.

It’ll be worth your while

But I’m going to stop asking since you keep saying no even though it would be an interesting time. Bye.

~ fin ~

Next Shenanigans Post

46 thoughts on “Shenanigans returns and curiosity gets the better of me.

  1. I had a fwb who is exactly the same as this. He starts with a ‘how are enough doing’ type convo to suck me in then it goes back to the classic ‘send me a dirty pic’ and/or ‘let’s meet up’ messages. These guys won’t change, they view us in one way and one way only. Even if their life changes, I suspect they’ll just stop messaging us rather than give us that ‘I’ve settled down and am getting married with this really sweet girl’ update.

    I’d say don’t message him back next time but I know what it’s like to get sucked in to this shit over and over. Gah! We need to switch the curiosity for them off somehow :/

    • Sometimes I wished I could show him the responses people provided when I shared transcripts of our texts – I knew I wasn’t crazy and he seemed to be assured of his correctness.

      I love the term douchenozzle.

      And yes, probably was a waste of my time. But when it became clear to me he wasn’t providing anything interesting I quickly became far more blunt.

  2. I can’t even think straight about what he is right now. I’m sort of sad for him. And for womankind, that men can’t seem to understand that no means no. Ugh!

  3. A bottle of wine! Well…since there is a bottle of WINE offered AND your penis – I will absolutely cheat on my boyfriend. I could NEVER buy a bottle of wine for MYSELF!

  4. He reads like a petulant over indulged child who is absolutely floored someone would tell him no. The maturity of a 12-year old. Even single I would hope you continue to say no, if nothing more than to mess with his head.

  5. Oh my. I feel sorry for him, it sounds like he’s an aging former heartthrob who can’t accept that he’s over 30 and perhaps losing his appeal to the 20-something crowd. The only thing that hasn’t changed for him is that he’s an ass.

What do you think?