Dating a Fox.

I will say it once (maybe more than that, but I’m trying). Fox and I do not have the same kind of instant and easy chemistry I have with Tony. Nobody has in the last 27 years. So it just is what it is and I have to move on from it. I’m not saying we have no chemistry – but it’s not the same. I fully expect nothing else will be, and if it is, I will be pleasantly surprised.


There are a LOT of things that Fox does that Tony never did. Wonderful things. Things I need and things I want. This post is about a few of those things.

I like it when Fox kisses me. Physically, he’s given me a full body orgasm every time we’ve had sex, and I never got that with Tony, who only let me be on top three times. Yes, that’s right: three times in seven months.

Fox asked me whether I thought he should get a Viagra / Cialis prescription to offset what he sees as a decline in his blood flow. When I said he should if he would feel better with it? Guess what, he went and did it. He’s got a prescription now and I can’t wait to try him on it when I get back from vacation.

He asks for my feedback on how he’s doing physically and is incorporating anything I tell him. It’s important to him that he’s pleasuring me. We haven’t had sex all that many times and I know it can keep getting better.

This is the man who heard my story and saw my bruises after my time on the cross with the Dom, and his response was “that’s fucking hot”. While he doesn’t do what he classifies as “whips and chains”, he’s certainly not entirely vanilla, either.

My favorite text from him so far is: “You know, I want to make love to you on a bed of roses and also DP you with toys. Weird.” I told him it wasn’t weird, it was awesome. He followed that up by telling me I had “great fuck faces”.

He compliments me regularly – not obsessively so, but when I send him a picture I get responses like “wow, amazing! so beautiful – thank you” or “you are so fucking hot”. It feels really great.

Here is an example of a typical exchange:

When he couldn’t come with me the second time I planned to meet the Dom and I asked him how he felt if I went anyway, his response was “it’s not something I can give to you”. He wasn’t threatened; he said if he was there he would likely watch and masturbate to the scene.

Most importantly perhaps, Fox sees me as the whole package and embraces it. He hasn’t shied away from anything I’ve told him so far.

When we asked about exclusivity, I was honest with him about my reluctance, not because I was seeking other relationships (yes, sorting out Tony aside) but because I’m on a sexual journey and don’t want to set myself up for failure.

Since I left on my vacation, he texted he would like to revisit that discussion. I know he will say he wants us to be exclusive. I said I would have the dialogue but then asked him to think about whether he’d be willing to “share” me with others, if we did so together.

Here’s how the conversation went:


So you can see…the dude is pretty cool. As I have said countless times, I think I want to have a primary relationship where we occasionally play with others. But that’s a total theory; I’ve never had enough of a primary relationship to really test that theory.

It seems as though Fox is willing to go there with me. And it’s not the only nice thing about him.

21 thoughts on “Dating a Fox.

    • It really is wonderful and I’m soaking it up. I’m looking forward to coming back from my vacation and really focussing on him, to see where things go and how the chemistry further develops.

  1. based on what you’ve shared so far, i think you have better chemistry with Fox than you do with Tony. Granted he may not give you the “omg, omg, omg” butterflies you get with Tony, but I think over time that’s going to diminish with Tony giving way to resentment,, From what I’ve seen so far, the relationship with Fox is much more sustainable and liable to grow.

    or you could just keep them both, and share with each of them a special part of what you’re looking for 😉

    • I do understand what you are saying. There is more relationship potential with Fox at this point, given everything. And the physical and conversational stuff is continuing to get better each time I see him.

      The chemistry I refer to when I speak of Tony is the physical and intellectual connection we’ve had since the first moment we met. It’s insanely powerful. I don’t see that ever fading, but the reality of his relationship readiness unfortunately overrides it. A real relationship can’t be sustained on chemistry alone.

  2. Some of the best relationships start out slow, meaning that one or both parties are just taking their time (not all electric, all the time). This could turn out to be YOUR “lightning in a bottle” too. Happy to hear about this new development in your journey.

  3. He does sound nice. I’m sorry about the bee. I’m happy for you that you have made your decision, it’s usually the hardest step to take. After that, it gets easier 🙂
    I can totally relate to the primary relationship with possible play times with others, not necessarily often or with many, but yes, I think ultimately, this is what I’d like too. And he may be willing to explore a MMF? That sounds promising 🙂
    Enjoy the end of your vacation.

  4. Fox definitely sounds like a good guy, and his openness and ability to communicate the way he does is really admirable. I’m rooting for you two.

    And FWIW, I think the concept of a primary relationship with occasional sex play with others is pretty much the best type of arrangement to have, as it allows the best of both worlds-a partner to build and share a life with, but at the same time being secure, communicative and honest enough to allow each other the freedom to scratch the itch for sexual novelty and variety. IMO, far more long term relationships and marriages would survive under this model.

  5. My relationship with the love of my life started with our connection being pretty good and then a couple months later ignited into red-hot passion. I’m so glad I gave it time to evolve–I would have missed out on so much.

  6. I haven’t read in a while but I like this a lot. Nobody is every going to match another person, obviously. Hopefully soon you’ll be able to stop comparing and just appreciate him.

What do you think?