While I posted my new dating rules just a couple days ago, they have been in effect for longer. And you may have noted I said I have different rules when it comes to sexual exploration. Which I’m not pursuing with the same intensity, but it’s still something I’m interested in. Especially since I’m not going to sleep with someone on the first date – a rule I didn’t even write!! – I have to get it somewhere.
I have two stories to share with you:
1) Your kinks are not my kinks
The first occurred at the tail end of my no-contact time with Tony. A woman reached out to me on FetLife saying she and her boyfriend of a year had broken up and he spotted my profile on FetLife and was intrigued.
While skeptical at first, once I established she wasn’t full of it and he was a real guy, he and I started emailing. He was clear he wasn’t looking for a relationship but he’d be open to just having one ongoing sexual relationship. He was HOT. So I figured why the hell not, and although I was ill I agreed to meet him for lunch. He knew I was sick and agreed to meet me anyway.
He was charming and funny and intelligent. He ran his own business. But what drew me in were his completely luscious lips and bedroom eyes. Shallow but true.
I wanted to fuck this man…so that’s what I did.
Not for the first time, the words going through my head during our afternoon delight were “dude, your kinks are not my kinks”.
Turns out, I’m not so much into tit slapping. Or holding my mouth open so he could fuck my face. Or him just holding my mouth open to look inside. Or his small cock that he didn’t even really fuck me well with.
I spent time masturbating after he left, so as to be satisfied.
I got him sick. Shocker. We texted for a few days afterwards. I wasn’t too upset when he politely told me as much as he loved our time together, he had met someone else he was going to focus on and didn’t have time for two. I said quite honestly I was impressed he took the time to say that, and wished him all the best.
Sidebar: He left a very dark and obvious bruise under my nipple. I had to use concealer the next day when I met Tony. Thank goodness Tony didn’t disappoint, and did pretty much the exact same thing to my breast, which prevented me from getting busted.
2) Why are the hot sexy smart ones super long distance?
I modified a few of my stories from this blog and posted them on Reddit. I was curious what kind of traffic it would drive to my blog, and what the feedback would be like. The feedback was 99% positive, and it drives traffic to my blog but barely any followers.
I had some men reach out to me with private messages. They were flirty and complimentary. One lives in New York and asked me out; perhaps on my next visit.
But one guy stood out from the rest; he’d just gotten out of a long-term relationship and they were swingers. He wrote thoughtful and interesting messages. We took our conversation from Reddit to email.
He sent me a picture. Fatal flaw for asking, Ann… fatal flaw.
Of course, he’s tall, dark, handsome, fit, well endowed, intelligent, and we are definitely sexually aligned. And over 2,000 miles from where I live. Dammit.
So yes, it’s 100% in violation of my rules. There is so little point engaging with someone long distance. I’ve done it before – and yes, of course, it was a wonderful romance while it lasted. It is also asking for so. much. trouble. Especially since he knows about the blog and has read a thing or two over here (hello, my handsome friend).
He wants someone to talk to. He wishes there were people he could tell everything to – and we’ve talked about my experiences blogging and how wonderful it’s been for me. I told him I’m happy to talk about pretty much anything with him but I don’t want to hear the details of his sexual exploits. I’m fine to know – for example – that this week he has three dates lined up with women he’s met online – and one has to be careful to not squirt every time she cums.
That’s enough information for me.
His ex was taller and heavier than me so he completely understands I don’t want to hear about the little Thai woman he fucked last week. One of the few sexual things I can’t be is the kind of woman a man can hoist around his hips and fuck her against a wall. Well, perhaps an incredibly strong basketball player. But I haven’t met any of those.
I’m not sure what’s going to happen with him, if anything. He is nice enough to say good morning and goodnight, and we text occasionally throughout the day. I’d be intrigued to meet him but in some ways that would make things much more difficult if we did have an amazing connection. He’s just come out of a relationship, and I would ideally like to be in one.
What I’m not doing is getting ahead of myself. At all. For now he’s fun to talk to, sends fantastic cock shots (although I’m just as likely to ask for face or other parts), and I’m okay with breaking my rule for him.