Guest Post | Scorpio / Snake

This post is written by a real-life friend who reads this blog. She, like me, has come out of a long relationship and is exploring and rediscovering her sexuality. This post is about one of her recent dates; she is considered writing more and would appreciate any story and writing feedback you have.

Thank you and enjoy!


Her cheekbones could cut glass – I think that was my first thought as she crossed the street to where I leaned against the lamppost biting my lip. Her eyes were staring at me with an intensity that made me feel slightly uncomfortable but in a very, very, good way. Her stare and half smile – those lips – said that she was pleased with what she saw and as she opened the door for me, I thought to myself “Trouble”.

I was wearing a new blue dress, soft chiffon with pale grey suede high heeled boots. I wanted to look soft and approachable and utterly feminine. I wore only diamond studs. She was in jeans and a black leather jacket. A kind of 1950’s bad boy look, with her dark hair shaved on the sides with grey streaks running through it. Just enough on the top to run your fingers through.

The night was warm enough so we sat outside. The patio was quiet with only one table of gay men sharing some stories close by but far enough away that we felt alone.

Our conversation was already flowing comfortably, she had a beer and I ordered a Manhattan, I was going to need some courage to meet this woman’s confident yet controlled energy. I bubbled and giggled and blathered on about my life, throwing out jokes and rolling my eyes. She spoke calmly and with great precision about living around the word, her artistic projects and creative jobs. The time she joined a traveling burlesque show…

I wondered what talents she learned on the road, but didn’t dare ask.

She traced the lines on her face where she would put on her sideburns — those cheekbones. Was it obvious that my breath became a little ragged? Have I ever had this experience before, I wondered, an immediate attraction that was so strong I felt utterly paralyzed by it?

I played with my curls and she said how much she liked them but preferred the photos where my hair was brown instead of blonde. I briefly thought of bolting out of my chair to the nearest pharmacy for some Ms. Clairol. She said I was very beautiful and I said I thought she was too and was surprised as she briskly said “No. You say Handsome. I prefer to be called handsome”. She is a proud cock I thought. “I feel more like a straight man than I do a woman”. But she used feminine pronouns? There is more to that story but ah – I want to know what her skin feels like. I don’t care about the rest – it’s just grammar.

After two drinks, the hour was getting late. She stared hypnotically into my eyes and said “I’d like to sit beside you” and she rose from her chair, keeping eye contact. I couldn’t hold it. She laughed and said “do you want to keep your purse between us” and I brazenly said “do you want to kiss me or keep rearranging things?”

And then Oh my lord. If I had been standing I would have collapsed to the ground. My head is still spinning from the thought of her lips on mine. I have a problem with willpower and I promised myself that I would stop dating for a while after Virgo/Monkey and Libra/Tiger stomped on my heart. I need to turn down the noise in my life right now and do things that nourish me and not deplete me. Another failed relationship at this point could spell doom.

But I couldn’t hear my own words when she kissed me, all I could hear was the sound of her leather jacket rubbing against my chiffon dress and my heart thundering in my ears and I wanted with everything in my being to push her back on the bench and swing my legs around her and take over – I had to stop.

I buried my face into her neck and breathed in her cologne – so tasteful – just barely there. We sat entwined in comfortable silence and it felt extremely intimate and natural. She played with my fingers and exhaled. Was this real? Was it the Manhattan’s? Was the chemistry really that powerful between us?

I think miles ahead of every situation and I was already picturing the pleasure that I knew this person was going to bring me sometime soon. She seemed to have spent her life perfecting her sensuality. The balance of masculine energy with this stunning face, these gorgeous eyes that were daring me to find out her secrets.

But the most astonishing part about her, was this gentle warmth she exuded along with her strength that seemed to say “everything is ok. You can be comfortable expressing yourself with me – I can take it all. Give it to me”.

I kissed her this time. She sucked on my lip and the room was spinning and I knew I was going down for the count. “I can’t go home with you tonight” I blurted out like a drowning woman coming up from the water begging for help from land. And she wrapped a curl around her finger and said “I don’t want you to. I am old fashioned. I’d like to go on another date with you soon though.”….we kissed a while longer and she walked me to the cab. She checked the taxi number and looked the cab driver in the eyes, protective.

Swoon.

I have been alone in this world for a year now, since the divorce, with no one to care for me. I have two small children to protect and the burden of this does not weigh lightly on me. The thought of having someone to watch over me again, even for an hour or two, was intoxicating.

She opened my car door and leaned down to kiss me goodnight. She wished me “Sweet Dreams”. “Oh I’ll dream alright”, I said with a wink, “but they won’t be sweet”….

And they weren’t. But dreams, I keep to myself…..

34 thoughts on “Guest Post | Scorpio / Snake

  1. i want to hear more,,

    great writing, gawd the imagery you put in my head, i’m dizzy,,

    if you EVER start a blog,

    ann you HAVE to link it.

    I’m hoping (and expecting) date #2 went well 🙂

  2. This pulled me in right away. I like how she writes. Straight to the point but with just enough detail to grab you (a nice change from my ramblings 😉 ).
    It is lovely and sexy and… I want more 🙂
    Oh, and on another note: all the best with the divorce and its aftermath. It’s not easy, I know.

  3. Damn that’s good, I certainly hope they exchanged phone numbers in addition to spit. I can almost hear my wife starting to pant.

    I believe that if she wants to, she could easily become an excellent erotic writer. Tell her if she needs advice getting published to reach out to me.

      • You tend to be more of a “fact finding” type of writing as you describe your adventures. This mode is how most bloggers write.

        But what you have to do is put them in more of a story mode. Hard to explain but you can write about it and that’s a major part. You have to be able to let the characters loose in your brain so they can do what they want.

        The characters in the story are not you so that you can mold what they do to increase the impact of the story. Since it is a story, you are free to improve everything until it is exactly how you would fantasize it.

        For example if you went back and combined the posts of your latest trip to the swing club into one document. Then went back and said if I could make all this a fantasy, how would I change it. Then try that!

      • First, kudos to her for being brave enough to explore her sexuality! But, she said, “I have a problem with willpower and I promised myself that I would stop dating for a while after Virgo/Monkey and Libra/Tiger stomped on my heart. I need to turn down the noise in my life right now and do things that nourish me and not deplete me.”

        My question – and because I’m forever curious about why women think this way – is why does she feel that a lack of willpower when it comes to dating – and suffering failures – depletes her? Does she realize that failing to do that which does nurture us – fulfilling that need to be with someone in some way – is what depletes us and is, in fact, self-defeating?

        As you know, nothing in life is risk free; the ideal relationship situation we have in our heads isn’t always going to be reflected in reality and if we risk nothing, we gain nothing; if we keep allowing our fears in this to make us foolish – read this as being hesitant and literally afraid – then we stifle ourselves: We’re now our own worst enemy; we don’t need someone to do something bad or hurtful to us because we can do that all by ourselves by not wanting to take chances in this.

        Getting your heart stomped on, microwaved, and served up with garnish on a platter is a part of our existence; it’s not that one can be hurt – we all get hurt (and will be hurt) – it’s what you do afterward that matters… and women tend to run and hide; they refuse to date and/or become celibate because they see any failures in this to be depleting.

        And I maintain that this is a very, very bad way for women to think.

        I’m wondering how she can be so bold and daring to explore her sexuality – something a lot of women are scared to death to explore… but not so bold in another important area – relating with someone and the best way you can.

        Lemme know what she says because I really wanna know. Sigh, y’all women folk just make me insane…

        • If I may… Maybe her writing that there is an important phrase in the excerpt that you omitted. “For a while”. To me, this means that she realises that the relationships she’s had in the past were not satisfying and she’s giving herself some time to figure it out before moving into another relationship. Some time to work on it, to think it through, to make a list of her wants and her needs and what she doesn’t want and so on.
          Not dating doesn’t necessarily mean not having sex. At least not in the way North Americans mean it, from what I’ve understood…
          I may be completely wrong, but maybe that’s something that women need to do because we’ve been told so much, from the time we’re little girls, that we should look for Prince Charming, and that everything will be perfect once he’s found us (note it’s not even we found him, it’s like he’s the one to have the choice)… maybe sometimes we just need to step back and observe for a while, observe what patterns we have that throw us into shitty relationships, why we react the way we do, and what we are willing to do to live with it or change it…

          • Hi Dawn! Didn’t miss that phrase! But, um, why continue to believe that “Prince Charming” exists when you also know there’s really no such animal? Is it hope or something else that might defy the reality of relationships?

            Nope, dating and sex aren’t the same things as far as I know of but women have a breakup, turn into nuns for X-amount of time to rethink themselves, eschewing social contact and other mystifying things, only to get back on the horse and, eventually, wind up back at square one and with the firm impression that something’s wrong with them… and I’ve always wondered why they do this when, more often than not, it never really seems to help them.

            Inquiring minds still wanna know because y’all are quick to point out how us guys don’t understand you…

          • Who said we continue to believe Prince Charming exists? Actually, this is one of the things I’m working hard towards, is making sure I understand that I don’t need to be rescued, so maybe I’m looking for ‘the One’, but certainly not for Prince Charming!
            I can’t speak for others, I can only say that I have made damn sure (and still am) that I’m not going back to the same sort of relationship as I was in before. And also that I’m far from celibate, actually it’s the one thing that has been constant since I left the marital home, is how I’m trying to find myself in what I do and who I do it with. So I guess I just don’t relate to the description you just gave of women. And I can assure you, I’m 100% sure I’m a woman 😉
            I guess I’m trying to say: maybe it would be good not to generalise, and it would probably be more productive to try and understand one woman at a time, because we’re not all the same 😉

          • It’s one big observation and I do know it’s not all women… but I’m not talking about them. I see women do this, know too many who do it so when I hear of a woman who’s doing it, I want to know why.

            So let’s see what Ann’s guest blogger has to say!

          • I hear what you’re saying, but again, I don’t think that what she was saying is what you are saying… I guess we’ll have to wait until she responds 😉

  4. Well hello there. Ann was so kind to post my first date story and help me set up my first ever blog! I am a nervous and quivering writing virgin and would appreciate all of your gentle support and patience through this. Your encouragement Ann (and her wonderful readers) means so much. Love you to pieces Ann.

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