I'm putting myself out there with a few of you.

InΒ just under two weeks I’m going to meet several bloggers. That’s not how the plan started, but it’s what has happened. I’m a little nervous about it, to be honest.

One I have met before, albeit briefly. I have no doubt, given our on and off blog interactions, we will have a great dinner and drinks and talk non-stop. Definitely not nervous about meeting them.

But the others I haven’t met before.

One has lamented I am exclusive with TonyΒ since despite never meeting me in person, he seems sure he will want to fuck me. I’m glad I come across so desirable, I suppose, but am sure I will disappoint since a fantasy is rarely as good as reality.

One I have barely spoken with off-blog yet when I mentioned I would be in his city, he said he’d like to take me for a drink. We have some similar aspirations when it comes to the opposite sex, and similar appetites, so he’s interested in talking. A meeting of the minds only, as there has been no flirting whatsoever. I’m a little afraid of being attracted to him…from his blog is seems he has a rather magnetic personality.

Then there is another blogger who is married, isn’t a sex blogger at all, and I am a big admirer of his writing. We’ve talked off and on since shortly after I started blogging. Never flirting, just an exchange of stories. I want to meet him and suggested we do so when I knew I’d be nearby. We are trying to sort out schedules to make sure we can meet. If he chose to talk about me, I hope he’d be kind.

There are a couple others as well who I’ve invited to join me and the first blogger I mentioned for drinks one night. A flock of bloggers, as it were. Some I know better than others.

But my anonymity is important to me, so I’ve been thinking about what to share, since I realized I could meet upwards of seven bloggers. A couple of these people know my real name. Only one knows the company I work for. Although I am very open on my blog, there are things I don’t share. Name, location, profession, company…those kinds of things. So am I really willing to share those things with people I don’t know that well?

Nope.

Do I think it will impede any conversation whatsoever? Nope. It hasn’t stopped my almost 400 posts here, so can’t imagine it will stop a couple hours of cocktails. Yes, I used that word very deliberately.

Do I worry that I will disappoint? Yes, somewhat. I’m confident about who I am and don’t spend a lot of time trying to be someone I’m not. On my blog I try to be who I am in real life, as I don’t know how to be anyone else. So I feel like this is an accurate reflection of me, but I can’t control the blanks someone might fill in. What do they think I will look like? Sound lke? Do they think my comments about having a generous behind is just typical female hating my body crap?

Who knows. Again, something I have to put in the “things I can’t control” box.

I suppose I hope they will write about it – publicly or privately – so I can have an opportunity to learn how I come across on my blog and what, if any, differences there are from me in person.

And I’ve been deliberately vague here about them, even though most are found commenting on my blog. They are welcome to “out” themselves since I won’t make it a secret where I’m going, but some of them say where they live, and others don’t. And some, no doubt, prefer to keep their off blog meetings private, even if no shenanigans are planned.

0 thoughts on “I'm putting myself out there with a few of you.

    • I couldn’t exactly comment on your situation now, could I, given it would be a dead giveaway of our identity.

      But since you mentioned it, about you I would have said:

      “Another blogger is a virgin, and getting laid is the focus of his blog. Had it not been for my current relationship status I would honestly consider doing him a solid and helping him change his situation. At the very least, I look forward to giving him some feedback on perhaps why he’s been stymied on his quest.”

      • You could have said that. And I would definitely like to meet you, but my schedule is going to be tight around that time. I’ll definitely try to fit you in if I can!

        btw – you should think of this as a mini-WordPress Blogger Convention!

  1. I hope everyone involved in your offline adventures has a wonderful time, Ann. I’m sure they will find you as interesting, funny, warm, and caring as you present in your writing here.

  2. My sister and I (and my husband) went to EroticonUSA in 2013, the only year it’s been in America. There, we met well over 40 erotic/sex bloggers. It was amazing, and I also value my anonymity, but with this group I wasn’t concerned, and nor should I have been so. Even when they wrote up the moments we spent together, it was with permission first.
    I think you’ll be fine if you are with established bloggers that you respect – they are worth that respect if you follow, read, and agree to meet with.

    • That would have been so much fun!

      I guess I should clarify that it’s no so much that I wouldn’t trust these people, as that tends to be my opening position with anyone. It’s more a fear of ending up having a joint connection, knowing someone who knows someone, that kind of thing. It’s hard to put the genie back in that bottle.

  3. Sounds like a lot of fun. I’ve met a few bloggers, but they were really twitter connections first and then I started reading them. Met them at a similar function to Cammiesonthefloor. I’d love to meet some of the characters around here and fear letting them down as you do, but I think most would find us to be exactly the person they had in mind… as long as we were being ourselves here. I’m a bit out of the way so that somewhat (conveniently?) keeps me from meeting bloggers. I have a difficult time opening myself up as well. Best of luck to you! Enjoy!

    • I do hope most would be like that… there are always exceptions, of course, but with those who I am meeting, their blogs reflect who they are (as far as I know) – I guess I will find out!!

      There are definitely pros and cons to meeting people off blog. More of the former, for sure, but I’ve learned the hard way that it’s not always sunshine and roses.

      I doubt you would let anyone down – I suppose it all comes down to expectations?

  4. I don’t mind outing myself πŸ™‚ I sent you an email when you asked me to, but never heard back, so I hope I made the cut! lol. Even if I didn’t, I think you’re safe and fine to reveal as much or as little about yourself as you like. It’s you and you get to decide what you do with you, not anyone else. I know if I wrote about a meeting with a fellow blogger I would only share generic details at best, and if he or she didn’t want me to share, then I absolutely wouldn’t even mention it. I met with another blogger once a couple of summers ago for a very sexy overnight, and we kept all the details private. But then she and I have had a long duration email (and sometimes phone) relationship beyond the blog and the comments.
    And for the record, based on your writing I think you’re super hot, regardless of what you look like, and would love to fuck you too, I just never mentioned it because I figured you weren’t interested! LOL

    • Well I have to go check my email because I obviously totally missed your email – sorry πŸ™‚

      That’s fun you met another blogger…sounds pretty hot! I generally don’t mind being written about as long as the other blogger and I discuss any parameters in advance…like where we met, etc., which is sometimes and issue given some of us don’t say where we live.

      I generally try to be myself so hopefully I’m never too much of a surprise. I know Johnny said I was very much like my blog, and he knew me pretty damn well.

      And I’m pleased you think I’m hot and that other stuff too πŸ™‚

      I’m sincerely flattered.

      And yes, please join us on Friday night πŸ™‚

      • No worries on the email, maybe it went to the dreaded spam filter? Are you coming out THIS Friday as in 2/19?! If so I am really going to be bummed because I am heading to New Hampshire for the weekend. I HOPE that maybe it’s next Friday?? Or that if it isn’t you’ll let me know when the next time is in advance so I can clear my schedule πŸ™‚
        Meeting the other blogger was hot, beautiful and wonderful. She lives halfway across the country and we never thought our paths would cross in person. By good fortune we ended up together for 24 delicious hours. We had become good friends before meeting in person, and after we got over the initial awkwardness of meeting in person we were like best friends who hadn’t seen each other in years. It was really special for both of us, even if it never happens again.
        Being yourself is super awesome, especially if you’ve only recently really figured out who you are πŸ˜‰
        I’m glad you’re flattered…you should be. You write very well, and are an engaging author, and you have a compelling story to tell from a fresh and interesting voice. And the fact that you are so comfortable with sex makes you an amazing woman to any man worth his salt. A large amount of a woman’s sex appeal is her attitude and her mind. From what you write and say about yourself, you score super high in the attractive category…and I’m sure you’re very good looking also πŸ™‚

  5. I have been in the same situation as I have always been an anonymous blogger. My online persona was the superman to my Clark Kent, so I wa always afraid I’d neve live up to it. I only met with two of them, but actually we became great friends. So my advice is take a chance but be selective.

  6. Now this sounds like fun and I’m sure that all of the bloggers you end up meeting will safeguard any and all information you are willing to share just as you will with them. Isn’t there an unwritten bloggers code of ethics we all follow for situations like this?:D

    and I’m sure that you have nothing to worry about when it comes to how you might be viewed or liked, enough of you comes through here on your blog for them to be able to see that you are authentic in everything you give us.

    Have a blast and a drink for me. πŸ™‚

    • I realized I should have clarified I’m less worried about someone being indiscreet as just that it’s a very small world and if someone ended up having a real life connection to me, it would be awkward.

      For example, one of the female bloggers around these parts met someone who I had worked with years ago. She and I live in totally different cities, way far apart, and are in completely different industries. Never would have thought we would have a shared connection.

      And thank you for the reassurance on my authenticity… I don’t know how to be anyone else, and I can think of only two things I’ve deliberately chosen not to share here (that I otherwise would) as it would have caused unnecessary hurt…. so yeah, I guess my authenticity is important to me.

      • I had a moment once where I suspected a fellow blogger might actually be a customer. I silently panicked about it and it was one of the million times I considered privatizing my blog. Then I figured he was in the same boat as me with an anon blog and even if we did end up knowing one another he would more than likely never take the chance to out me because in doing so it would be outing himself.

        I don’t think by holding back bits and pieces of who you are would make you any less genuine either. I don’t share everything about me, but it doesn’t mean that what I do share isn’t real. Know what I mean? πŸ™‚

  7. I’ve meet a few bloggers and I’m always worried I come off as nothing like people expect. The experiences have always been good as I’m sure this experience will be for you. πŸ™‚

    • So glad to hear your experiences have always been good!! I’m sure I will have fun… But honestly having one of them say I’m their hero just makes me feel uncomfortable, because I’m just me.

  8. I imagine you will have a wonderful time. You are just you, as most of us are, just what we are, how we are wired. What others perceive is beyond our control. You just go ahead and be you. (and tell me where you are going, if it’s near me, I can just happen to be at the same place, at the same time, checking all the blue eyeballs in the joint πŸ˜‰ kidding Ann, just kidding!)

      • nor the inclination. It is something that comes with age. Suddenly we realize it is so consuming trying to be whatever for some reason. Maybe we become more comfortable with who we are and understand that it doesn’t matter who doesn’t like it. I am a little bit older than you, so I might be a little bit further along, but it appears you are moving in that direction.

        • Yes, that’s a very good point. I have no desire to be someone I’m not – and I’ve been comfortable with who I am for quite a long time.

          However, I do have a very strong desire to continue to grow and develop…so I never believe I’m “fully baked” as a human.

  9. I’m not likely to meet any of my blogger friends, not if i don’t plan on hopping on any long distance flights.
    πŸ™‚ Sounds like fun and approach with caution. Only time will tell.

    πŸ™‚ I’m loving your comment section by the way.. πŸ™‚

  10. Sounds like you’ll have a great time.

    Enjoy the meet ups and you’re right. You don’t have to give anything else away but your name πŸ™‚

  11. It isn’t so much a question of putting yourself out there, but more a question of asking for discretion and respect from your fellow bloggers. Those who choose to blog under a nom de plume for sensible reasons sometimes have to directly ask for discretion, as not everyone is on the same page of respect for others craft and situation.
    I can only speak for myself of course, but I keep a very deep and well fenced gap between work and my blog life, never commenting on work-related items. But that’s me and how I choose to write. In your circumstance, you should ask, directly, without shade or colouration, for discretion. I think, having read comments and some blogs of many who inhabit this space, that there will be no issues of indiscretions.

    • It’s a good point – I don’t think anyone I know would deliberately cause me harm. It’s probably more that I risk running into someone who is connected to me somehow, or that by accident something gets out that I didn’t intend.

      I’ve had a couple people post in comments things that were shared privately – but they have never been intentional. It sometimes gets hard for all of us to remember what is public and what is private.

      I remember Johnny was afraid he’d call me “Ann” in front of my parents πŸ™‚

  12. Well color me envious! Hoping we to shall meet as I’m betting that we’d get along as well as Lady M and I 😊 alas, unless you travel to the west coast of my country pr perhaps you can be in London when M & I hope to be in the fall???….

What do you think?