The night he cooked me dinner and we tested his bed (Date #4) Part 1

For the back story, please go to my lovers page, where Tony now has his own section 😀


Friday night I felt like death and Saturday morning wasn’t much better. My son was still with Will, my ex. I watched the last two episodes of “Boardwalk Empire”, then the movie “Saving Mr. Banks” (I bawled on three separate occasions but think it said more about my mental state than the movie, although it was quite good), and started a movie about Marilyn Munroe.

Tony had texted a few times during the day but called me to sort out final plans. He called and told me he preferred it over text and he said “ah there’s the voice I wanted to hear”… following it with some humor about my being sick and not sounding my best.

Turns out he was cooking dinner for me at his place. So fun!! His original plan was dinner at his place then we would go out from there. We have a running joke about who is the better bowler, so that was a candidate. But there was a brutal winter storm happening and we both conceded that the after-dinner fun might be restricted to his place.

My coming over to his place felt like a bit of a big deal – on one of our earliest conversations he mentioned it was a disaster zone and would require quite a bit of cleaning before it was suitable for anyone. My coming over to his place meant that he had done the work needed to have me there…which means an effort was made.

Effort expended is a very good sign, in my book.

He is also very well-mannered, which goes a long way with me.

He’s been in his place for six months but doesn’t know yet where the indoor visitor parking is, nor does he know how to buzz someone upstairs. I suppose this just reinforces for me he hasn’t had a lot of overnight visitors.

His bedroom has a half-wall and railing overlooking the living room, and a king size bed. With a metal head and footboard with lots of posts. I noted the height of the bed (high) and the restraints peeking out from the bottom of the footboard.

I don’t think I wrote about the restraint conversation. After his first somewhat shy comment about having restraints, he told me he had bought them to use with his ex, and they never used them. So when he was packing up to leave their house, he took them with him. He told me they were still unused.

As he gave me the tour we would stop and kiss every few minutes. We’d break apart and talk and the kiss some more. Finally he said he had to get dinner going or we would never eat. He had spent quite a bit of time cooking and had prepared the sides in advance. He poured wine and we went upstairs to the roof where the grills were, so he could grill the elk steaks he got for us. He had pre-heated the grill, naturally.

Dinner was salad, elk steak, and three different sides. It was delicious. I was impressed. Despite it being the first real meal I had had since New Years Eve, I did remarkably well. I can’t tell you what we talked about, but as with every other time, the conversation just flowed. While he doesn’t ask me a lot of questions, we do banter back and forth…it’s not like there is no space for things I want to say (like the Giant, for example).

We have some things in common but there is lots that is different as well. For example, he is way more sporty than I – he was an athlete, does yoga, and sees a trainer regularly (which I still haven’t managed to get back to). He’s big fan of a sport I don’t follow at all.

But he isn’t one dimensional. I’ve met men who are pretty much only about sports. Or only about the arts. Or being an investment banker. Or their healthy lifestyle (yawn). I can’t stand that. I’m not like that. I like opera as much as some sports games on a summer day (meaning, a LOT). I like to go to nice restaurants sometimes but am also really happy finding a fantastic fish and chips at a pub. It’s been hard for me to find someone who could be comfortable in all the different spheres I like.

After dinner we agreed that going out was rather silly. The storm had subsided but not entirely. We sat on the couch and talked and kissed and talked some more. At some point he decided that we would be far more comfortable in his bed.

Date #4 and the passion is still there… not that I expected otherwise, but it’s nice. I can see with him there is potential for things to continue to get better. He explores, takes his time, likes to please. We touch each other a lot. I really like his body. His arms aren’t huge but they are muscular. His chest is great and I’m pleased he hasn’t gotten the memo yet that men don’t have hair these days.

We fit well together. He’s 6’1 and I’m 5’10 and when standing in front of him his broad shoulders and chest envelop me. It’s an amazing feeling.

He is vocal – he tells me how much I turn him on. How sexy I am. How much he loves hearing me cum. He’s learning some things about my body now, and he likes playing me like an instrument. He knows that after I cum several times, my entire body is super sensitive. He knows that after a particularly intense orgasm, my legs will twitch.

Yes, there is still the problem of sustained hardness. It comes and goes, pardon the pun. There have been some moments of great pleasure with him inside of me, but I found myself fantasizing about Viagra. We haven’t really talked about the issue – he only made one comment in passing about only being “semi hard”. I guess I have been lucky that I haven’t had to deal with it – but I also have no idea what, if anything, to say.

Once that night when he lost his erection he brought out a small vibrator and spent some time with me afterwards. He’s bringing me to some nice orgasms and I know he will take some direction when I choose to give it to him. He needs to find my g-spot.

His bed was really comfortable and I had no issues falling asleep… we started in each others arms but he’s a twitchy sleeper so I found a way to get my space but stay somewhat connected.

Date #4 was far from over.

0 thoughts on “The night he cooked me dinner and we tested his bed (Date #4) Part 1

  1. I cant remember the last time a man cooked for me! I am still holding out hope he can find a way to work out the erectile dysfunction issue. I wonder if he is on anti-depressants? Those can cause poor quality erections and make them difficult to maintain.

  2. So happy to read this about Tony! I think the restraints are coming put sooner than later! 😄. ED is a resolvable problem. Its just having that initial conversation and subsequent agreement that it exists and needs to be remidied.

  3. Ann, Tony sounds wonderful and I am loving these stories about you and him each and every day that you post them! Even with his hardness issues, he sounds like he is an amazing lover. I can’t wait to hear how things step up for you both once that gets sorted out!

    You are so deserving of the attention that he is giving to you. I can imagine the butterflies you are feeling when you are with him and the anticipation you feel on the way to his house is nothing short of pure excitement!

    I am so happy for you, Ann!!!

    • Well before it can get sorted I have to be comfortable with bringing it up as a problem. Which is no small thing to do. So the issues may persist for a while… I figure I need to have a few more dates with him before we can get to that kind of conversation.

      And butterflies? It’s actually just nice… I’m certainly looking forward to seeing him again, but it’s fun, and comfortable, and sexy. All really good things.

  4. I like Tony!
    Like everyone else has said… I’m sure there are solutions to whatever problems he has. But I guess it tends to happen more and more with age, and the fact that we only discovered ourselves so late and are now having a great time (at least in so far as I’m concerned) does mean that the men have also grown older… I mean, the younger ones are cute, but I’m not sure I would have the patience to teach them. Or know how and what to teach them (sorry for our younger friends around these parts). I don’t know, I’m having a weird day. That may be what leads to a weird comment :-/

    • I’ve been really lucky that I haven’t encountered this issue all that often. Tony isn’t yet 40 so he’s not that old…but yes, I know with our – ahem – advancing age there’s more potential the men we meet will have issues.

      I too don’t really want to teach anyone anything…although it was a bit fun showing Shenanigans my dildos and vibrators.

      • I feel I still have so much to learn myself… See, I couldn’t even show anyone a dildo, I would need to own one first 😉
        I have lacked being taken care of far too long, I must have become impatient now, I just cannot seem to want to teach much of the basics. Like: yep, playing with a toy, togethr, can be fun 😉
        Oh well… Maybe I’ll change with time, but that’s where I am right now.

        • I don’t think it’s necessarily about being impatient, but perhaps about what turns you on? I don’t like teaching someone… not because I don’t love to teach (I do in my professional life) but because I want someone to be more of a boss in the bedroom.

          • I think for me it’s a combination of both 😉
            I don’t mind teaching. But maybe not the basics. At least not as far as sex is concerned 😉

  5. At least you’re on the right path.
    Sounds like the erection conversation is imminent but don’t rush; build a solid relationship and then deal with his issue.
    Happy Friday, Ann!

  6. Floppy cocky – happens when a man has been in a very long-term relationship and struggles to maintain an erection with a new lover. Happened to me. The brain becomes imprinted with the image of what his lover looks like, a kind of conditioning, so when a new image appears the brain reacts and blood rushes there instead of down below. It’s a temporary condition and passes with time and many intimate encounters. It’s a sign that he hasn’t slept around much.

    On another score, the only other man I know who cooks and cleans his place for a woman is…me.

    You might want to take the time to see where things lead with him. There aren’t too many guys like him out there.

What do you think?