Follow-up to the arrogant-yet-intriguing OK Cupid guy

Read this post if you don’t know to whom I’m referring.

He sent me a pic but his mouth was cut off. I responded back with “But you left out those soft lips of which you speak?”

He sent me another pic. A dressed mirror selfie from his knees up. He’s attractive in a swarthy Eastern European kinda way. I know he’s just my height.

Anyway…I wrote my post, got your great comments, and didn’t respond back to him.

This morning I got the following email:

“I perfectly understand how attraction works and am not offended with you switching into silence mode but expected at least a farewell sentence.

It was actually the most normal thing he had written so far.

I emailed back “Oh it’s not that…you are attractive and yes I should have responded. I found your barrage on OkC rather off-putting so was debating what to tell you.”

He said “Barrage?”

I said “Yes. You guessing all kinds of things without me – sounded fairly generic. You presuming what I wanted – without asking. And your assertion that I was chasing you and would be lucky to catch you. While the latter may be true, it goes both ways.”

And he said “It was my way of trying to get you interested…. I guess you are used to one liner guys who will say something like: ‘hey baby…you are so pretty…can we meet?’ not me….fortunately or unfortunately :)”


I haven’t responded back. Not sure if I will.

0 thoughts on “Follow-up to the arrogant-yet-intriguing OK Cupid guy

  1. I keep My initial opinion. And his more standard approach now has just confirmed my suspicions of his initial tone. What you have said to him made it sound as if you took everything he wrote before literally. He probably should had clarified that in his last message. Surely ; he was trying to pique your interest -which it worked to some extent.

    There’s always the possibility that he does this with everyone else -I’m not that naive. but if we reflect on that; how many ‘hey how are you’ standard messages do these other guys send? At least he made an effort? Just my two cents 🙂

    • Yes, and to be honest it was that effort (and that I liked some of the messages) that made me reach out to him. I get how difficult it is for some guys to reach out. I don’t ignore someone who just says “good morning”… I check out their profiles and see what else is there. A weak opener plus a profile that says nothing just means they aren’t serious. But a weak opener with a good profile is okay by me.

  2. you have to respond if only to say how you appreciated the interest just joined not his demeanor to which he dished it. tell him thanks, but you don’t see your personalities clicking , wish him luck and buh-bye.

  3. It is so darn hard to decipher people isn’t it? He possesses the vocabulary, but do you need waders? Cause the shit seems a little deep too..

  4. And he said “It was my way of trying to get you interested…. I guess you are used to one liner guys who will say something like: ‘hey baby…you are so pretty…can we meet?’ not me….fortunately or unfortunately :)”

    This kinda confirms something I’ve been thinking. From the beginning I’ve considered the possibility that he’s not a creep or weirdo, but simply trying to stand out from the pack. It can be really hard to get a woman’s attention via online dating when they are inundated with SO many messages, so some guys will go really outside the box. Now this guy may very well be a creep or weirdo, but part of me is thinking that maybe he just went overboard with his approach and now he’s realizing that.

    Hah – I almost want to suggest that you meet him, just to see if my hunch is right… 😀

    • Hmm… you are outvoted on meeting him but perhaps…

      I commented on something similar above – if someone has said something simple I don’t ignore it… I look at their profile like I do with everyone who gets in touch. If their profile is appealing to me and well written, I don’t give them a hard time for just saying “good morning”.

  5. If that’s his way of trying to get you interested it seems like he must be going off of some dating advice guide. I would be wary of any guy who came up with those lines on his own.

  6. Still think he’s an ass. He probably has another 5 women like you he’s trying the same thing with. but if you are intrigued then why not meet up with him and see if he;s as confident in real life as he seems in his messages.

  7. Ugh, you lost me at swarthy (excuse me as I go take a shower). While he may have been trying to stand out from the one-liner crowd, he chose a poor way to do so and that alone would make me question his judgment and or question whether or not he has insecurity issues that he tries to hide behind his mellifluous banter. Ick.

  8. Part of me selfishly wants you to meet up with him just so you can tell us whether or not he’s as fucking weird in real life. Realistically though I would’ve stopped talking to him at “”do you have what it takes to seduce me?” Not ok.

What do you think?