Wednesday night I met the Dog Trainer with the suspiciously small asset. Despite having walking pneumonia I thought I would be up to a short visit one night after my son went to sleep. Turns out I was a bit ambitious and it was actually more than I could handle. Live and learn (side note: I find myself saying that a lot lately).
Normally I wouldn’t meet a guy for the first time at my place, but given how much we had spoken and the various ways I triangulated his real identity, I wasn’t all that concerned.
He’s a BIG guy. Tall (6’2″) and bulky (250 lbs)… a bit of a stomach but gee, who am I to complain. He is just large. Literally, his hands are the largest I’ve ever seen on a man. If I can manage it I will take a pic comparing our hands just so you can see. The moment I saw his hands I thought “oh, maybe his cock isn’t that small after all”.
He drank wine and I drank water. We talked. He showed me some of his photography portfolio and we talked about the photographs on my walls which I took. He critiqued my stuff like he knew what he was talking about. He made no fast moves. At one point though, he was on a stool in my kitchen and I backed into him and he put his hand on my ass (seriously, it almost covers an entire cheek), and then moved it to my waist and put the other down my pants and well, it just went from there.
He is not the best kisser, but he’s good. But good lord, those hands. I love a strong and tall guy and he totally fits that bill. He put me up against a few walls on my main floor, and I just grabbed on to this shoulders or arms as he made me go weak in the knees with his ministrations.
We moved to the couch. He told me to lay down. And then proceeded to make me cum oh I dunno, 6 times maybe? We did NOT have sex (I promised Savannah I wouldn’t). He did it all with his fingers. At one point he stood up, took off his pants, kept his fingers inside me and stood up next to me so I could put his cock in my mouth. Based on that, I can report back that there is some decent girth. I’m giggling as I write that.
I’m not really good at multitasking so it was a challenge for me to cum, squirt, try not to hack up a lung, try not to scream so loud I woke my kid, and give a good blow job. It really tried my skill set.
He did not try to have sex with me.
This dude has got some kinks. He wanted me to play with myself while laying on the couch, and he watched and masturbated. Okay, sure. I had already had a few orgasms so I was content to do that. I know men are far more visual than women, but it still always makes me feel a little weird.
He knew I was capable of squirting (when he found out he was all cute, saying “oh I love squirty girls!”) and I’m sure was pleased he was able to make me squirt. I probably would have more if not for the sickness and upstairs presence of my child.
He left after midnight and I crashed really hard.
So, here’s my take after the marathon conversations and our first face-to-face meeting. He’s easy enough to be around. We definitely can talk and laugh and those are really good things for me. He’s also into me, which is nice. He’s not a player who wants to have multiple women around, although he could play with others. In a situation where there are multiple men, he wants to do the directing of the action.
Physically, it’s not a slam dunk, as one of my good friends would say. I’m attracted to him and I do like bigger guys, so those things are positive. He turns me on. He for sure knows how to make me cum. But there was something a little off – just not an excellent connection on what we want and how we choose to get it.
The other thing, though, is that I think he’s more dominant and more kinky than I am comfortable with. For example, we were texting about some sexual stuff earlier in the day and he asked me where I like men to cum. Cumming on my face came up. I said no, I don’t let anyone do that. He was peeved. I said that I have NEVER let a man cum on my face. I found it to be too much of a porn cliché and a bit degrading. But I also said perhaps someday I might, would really depend.
He asked how can I think that is degrading but having sex with 5 men isn’t? I explained that my wanting to have sex with multiple men isn’t degrading when it’s my choice and I’m in control (to a point) of the situation. Then he said that he would be the one wanting to direct the situation. So in his mind, it’s about me being submissive.
Back to the time on the couch. When he was masturbating he asked where he could cum – I said anywhere except my face. He was peeved. When I reminded him of our earlier conversation he just said well sometimes we do things we don’t like because our partner does.
I can honestly say it was hard to not have the visceral response I had that show on my face. In my opinion, it’s way to early to start playing that card. Right now, I need my boundaries respected, thank you very much.
It’s hard to put a finger on all the things right now, but I feel unsettled by the dynamic. There is no fucking way someone is going to boss me around. I am fine to have someone be rough with me in the bedroom, tell me what to do (to a point), and dominate. But take that out of the bedroom? No. Fucking. Way.
I haven’t written him off yet, but we will see how the next few conversations go.