Oh, Man on Tinder, thanks for the LOL.

As I mentioned in a recent post, I’m not on the dating sites right now. My profiles are still down, but I never bothered to delete my Tinder account. I just haven’t been logging on or swiping in any direction, andΒ there has been silence from the men I had matched with when I was on.

Until today. I got a “1 new message from Sasha” notice on my phone. Um, okay. I had no idea who Sasha is but I went in to look, and found this:

DTF1

I almost spit out my drink. It was, without question, the shortest and quickest offer for sex I’d ever received. For the blissfully unaware, DTF means “down to fuck”.

The better part? His profile picture is him holding a female toddler (his niece). He has the largest biceps I’ve ever seen…and I’m a total sucker for arms. But seriously, really?

I did respond, of course. How could I not? I said:

DTF2

It was actually a rather funny follow up conversation. I didn’t screen shot it, but it went like this:

  • Me: Don’t need to ask you what you are seeking here.
  • Him: Lol obviously sex with a hot older woman πŸ™‚
  • Me: Well I’m flattered, so thank you for that.
  • Him: Youre welcome πŸ™‚ r u interested
  • Me: I really don’t want a one time thing
  • Him: It wont be one time it will be daily πŸ™‚
  • Me: How many times daily?
  • Him: Lol I can go all day and night πŸ™‚
  • Me: Be careful what you promise. Men have tried and failed to wear me out.
  • Him: Lol so u wanna fuck?
  • Me: I would meet for a coffee first.

For the record, I had no intention of meeting himΒ for coffee, but I was testing a theory. As I figured, there was no response to that text.

As I said to someone after I became single, if someone won’t even invest the time to have a drink with me, there isΒ no way they are getting access to my parts.

0 thoughts on “Oh, Man on Tinder, thanks for the LOL.

  1. Whoa. I guess it’s good he knows what he wants. Lol. It’s rather rude but sometimes someone else’s rudeness saves us.
    I wonder if he’s having any luck with that opener…

  2. Thanks for the LOL Literally; as he starts every single sentence with ‘lol’. Haha, nothing really impresses me on Tinder anymore (unfortunately).

  3. Ann, you are great! Thanks for the definition of DTF, I feel so naΓ―ve. I tried to channel your courageous spirit on my most recent date, but he wasn’t up for it — but I did get another date with him!. You’re blog is inspires my courage — Thanks!

      • I wish I knew — he’s really confusing me! But I’m putting the most positive spin on it that he wants to take it slow and establish a solid relationship first (which would be awesome). Our next date is tomorrow evening, so I’m going to try to play it cool and see where he takes it (he’s planning the date this time). If it doesn’t work out, I keep telling myself that at least it will make for another blog posting — but I’ve got my fingers crossed it will turn out great. …If nothing else works, I guess I could ask him if he’s DTF?

What do you think?