My holiday letter, 1998

Some excerpts from my 9 December 1998 holiday letter:

“One thing I have learned since I graduated is that the decisions I make now seem to have a greater impact on my life than they did prior. It is hard to remember that this is it – this is life, and there is nothing that still needs to happen for it to be real. We spend high school and university life reaching and waiting for the end result, the certificate which either gets hung on the wall or put under the bed. Now, in my “real life”, I don’t get a report card or certificate on a regular basis! It has been a strange transition.”

“On a more personal note, somebody very special has entered my life, and I find myself considering things that once seemed impossible or unlikely. And, everyone who has seen me says I’m positively glowing, so it can’t be all bad. I will certainly keep you posted as we take the baby steps together toward more permanent things.”

This was the last holiday letter I sent until this past summer (which I cheekily said was better late than never, and I used my holiday cards).

My last journal entry until I started my blog was dated 28 December 1998. I had been with my ex-husband since the end of October of that year. I’m writing up the excerpts now and will post as another blog entry. There are so many things I wish I could tell my 25 year-old self.

Sigh.

0 thoughts on “My holiday letter, 1998

  1. Would you really go back and tell yourself things? If one thing changed you might not have your son, or you could be a completely different person. Shitty things have happened, but those shitty things, along with all the good things, made you into the amazing person you are today.

  2. Hmm no sign of brain damage yet, but I’ve got a close eye on it! I’m impressed that you sent out holiday letters! I’ve resorted to printing a photo with a short message from the Walmart photo center and I get exactly 12 copies to send out. 12 envelopes to address is about all I can muster at the holidays.

  3. Journals are interesting animals. I’ve read identical stuff 20 years apart…it’s like a movie that’s stuck or something. I think I’d tell my 25 year old self that things were going to work out okay, just to stop with the worrying.

  4. I was lamenting to a friend the other day about the fact that I was so stupid when I was younger, and how I wish I could go back and do it all again and make smarter decisions. I’d be willing to marry The Loser and Doc again so that I could get my kids – but I would have left them both right after the final impregnation. My friend (who is sickeningly wise and wonderful) turned to me and said, “That’s magical thinking, Jana – it can never happen, so why waste the energy or angst thinking about what could or should have been? Instead, just start making smart decisions now – you aren’t dead yet.”

    I know that is sensible advice, but I still wish I could go back in time.

What do you think?