Given everything going on with me and Johnny Id (see this post if you missed it yesterday), I’m going to just schedule my 1998 posts for the next couple of days, to give myself some time to figure things out.
I will write about us for sure, but I don’t want everything to just be raw emotion shared with the blogosphere…so please be patient and enjoy the trip down memory lane.
Excerpts from my last journal entry ever…shortly after meeting my ex-husband.
For Part One, read this post.
Friday night I had the best date of my life, no exaggeration. We made dinner reservations at the restaurant, a very hip swing club. Will looked great, and I must say I thought I looked stunning. He told me I was beautiful.
We might as well have been the only two people in the club, because we just focussed on each other. It was incredible. He held my hand and kissed me across the table.
At about 11pm, he said he desperately wanted to take me home. I told him we hadn’t danced yet! So he led me onto the dance floor.
We were the only couple dancing, but it felt great more than embarrassing.
[Sidebar: I can’t believe this didn’t make it into my journal, but as we were walking to the dance floor, a woman said to her partner “oh this is great! they will start the swing dancing now!!”]
Will is a couple inches taller than me, and he’s a good dancer. I must say, we were (are) a good looking couple. So we danced a few swing songs and he settled the bill and called a cab. He had asked me if I would stay at his place, and I saw no reason why I shouldn’t. Although I had been hesitant to be physical so fast with anyone in a long while, somehow with him everything clicked.
I felt that I could tell him anything – I trusted him. Sounds goofy as I write it but it’s true. I just knew things were right and good. And, the best part was (is) that the feeling was mutual.
We stopped at my place while I grabbed a bag, and then went to his apartment. He has a small junior one bedroom at…which he shares with his dog. We kissed in the elevator on the way up, very passionately. We stopped briefly to walk down the hall to his apartment, then started again as soon as we were inside. He really turned me on.
We made love.
Somehow, that doesn’t sum it up accurately. He is a passionate, capable, and interesting lover, with great equipment that he knows how to use. I stayed at his house all night Friday, and until 9pm on Saturday! In those 21 hours, we made love about 7 times, ate pie in his bed, and talked incessantly.
I think we slept a bit too… He gave me his pj bottoms to wear, told me I was beautiful, and generally won me over. With my mind, my heart, my soul, and most importantly, my gut, I do believe Will is the man I’m going to marry, and hopefully spend the rest of my life with.
More later – I must sleep.
So – more about him. Our day / night, our second date, was incredible. He told me he never kissed on the first date, and never had sex on the second. But, I guess both he and I broke our resolve with each other. I just sensed that we would have something very special together, and he thought the same thing (or so he said).
It was amazing. I have since spent a lot of brain time thinking about whether I am just feeling immature love / lust, the same was as I did with John or Lloyd. I know a lot more now, I’m a lot smarter when it comes to me.
So, it does make me think that the decisions I make now are better ones. One of the problems, of course, is that I don’t remember how I felt when I started dating John or Lloyd – I do know I have not felt this way for anyone in a long time, and what I feel for Will is much more intense and multi-levelled.
Part 3 Coming Soon!