When your ex makes a sex joke at your expense

Despite the stressful times, my ex and I get along pretty well most days. Last week we did have a rather large argument again about his leaving, and I had to endure more of the “you aren’t being a partner in this” and “you are the only one that thinks this is a big deal” bullshit. But we got it sorted out.

Last Sunday, I was still recovering from my surgery. When he dropped off my son, we chatted like we usually do.

He asked whether there was anything I needed him to do for me, since I was still not 100%. He does have his nice moments.

We then started talking about Johnny Id‘s visit, and he asked me, somewhat suggestively jokingly, whether I was worried about being healed by then. It went like this:

Him: So, do you figure you’ll be all healed by the time he arrives?

Me: Yeah, I’m sure I’ll be fine. Right now it only hurts when I move around.

Him: Well, then it for sure won’t be a problem for you then.

I had to admit, it was a very funny jab at me. He was very pleased with himself. He once told me having sex with me was like making love to a dead fish (he was really angry at the time). Our sex life was horrible, as I’ve written many times before. So in his mind, it’s a justifiable joke.

As I was laughing along, my internal monologue went: oh geez, he has no clue just how fucking insatiable I really am. How I literally have had 29 year-olds begging to please let them stop, and how one of my first dates after being single I ended up having sex 15 times.

I felt kind of bad. But was laughing on the outside.

I’m sure the reverse is true for him too. Well, I sincerely hope it is. I hope he has a great sex life now, that his confidence has been restored, that he’s gone back to the guy I knew at 25. But there’s no way in hell I’m going to ask!


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0 thoughts on “When your ex makes a sex joke at your expense

  1. I had the worst sex life with my ex. He insisted I was frigid and that I had issues that made me hate sex. I told him that it maybe was because he could never get me off. He blamed me for that too…
    Without any irony at all I can say safely that I am not frigid. I’m a fucking Nympho. I can’t get enough sex. I married a younger man 2nd time around and he takes vitamins and stays well hydrated to give me my “medicine:. LOL

    Some people are just not meant to be…and we can fool our minds into thinking so but our bodies are nobody’s bitch…they know long before we do that it’s not gonna work.

  2. You’re an evolved mammal, Ann. I like that.
    I’m sure you’re currently engaged in various carnal activities with Johnny, and so you won’t read this for some time… but great post!

  3. As I’ve posted about being in an *almost* (as if once every 6-10 weeks is enough) sexless marriage, for the last 24-years I believed it was me. All me. I now know that isn’t the case and I’ve come to realize that chemistry, connection, compatibility and desire, mutual desire, are very, very real and so important.

  4. Time ago I would thought the same as him. But it didn’t take me much time to discover that there were no girls that disliked to have sex, just some women that disliked to have sex with me, so I wouldn’t assume that if I had bad sex with someone it’s going to happens the same with other girl’s partners.
    bah, I’ve no problem with that, we are not meant to be loveable to everyone.

  5. I once had a girl say the first time we were together, “don’t bother with foreplay, it is f@£king pointless…” Needless to say this was not a positive sexual experience.

  6. “I literally have had 29 year-olds begging to please let them stop, and how one of my first dates after being single I ended up having sex 15 times.”

    Mmm… now that’s what I’m talking about.

  7. I laughed really, really hard at this because your ex is obviously talking about a totally different Ann. An Ann that I can’t, and don’t want, to imagine. What’s the opposite of a dead fish? A live fish? That’s not even close either… lets just say you’re amazing.

What do you think?