Nordic Man is destroyed by global warming

I have an obvious weakness for really tall, thick, dudes. You just have to read my “men I’ve slept with” posts (three in total!) to see some consistencies. To be fair, I also like my share of actors and musicians….


When I was 19, I met this guy at a dance club my friends and I frequented on a regular basis.   His nickname, which remained even after we got up the guts to talk to one another, was “Nordic Man”.  He was 6’4″, blonde, sharp features, somewhat cold and restrained… but super handsome.

We dated for a while before I went away for school. Several dates, he always insisted on paying, we had a lot of fun together, but then I moved away to go to school.  If memory serves (and I would have to go back and refer to my diaries to confirm) I don’t think we slept together during this time.

But then, he started coming to visit me at school. We would party, he’d smoke pot, and we would have really great sex. As cold as he sometimes was, he was very passionate in bed. He was a bit of a troubled soul, was hot and cold, and eventually I got tired of it all.

But in my memory, he is a slim, tall, hot, sexy dude.

Sometimes, it’s WAY better for them to just stay in your memory.

Last year I was at a baseball game with my son, my father-in-law, and his girlfriend.  We were in great seats a few rows first base. I noticed a camera man who looked vaguely familiar.  My first thought was – OMG that’s Nordic Man – but then decided I was crazy because he seemed so un-like the guy I remembered.

I spent the next several innings debating whether I should go down and say hi, and trying to see the name on his security pass. Finally I got smart and took a photo and blew it up.

There was his name.


He was still tall, obviously… but was bald, quite overweight, and his face was not aging gracefully. The cranky personality showed. Even with the passage of time and the effects of aging, I was surprised there was none of the attraction I used to feel.

I didn’t go down and say hello.


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0 thoughts on “Nordic Man is destroyed by global warming

  1. While I never saw Miranda again, a friend of mine ran into her years later. She was gained a lot of weight, was in a loveless marriage, saddled with children, and was totally miserable. Can’t say that didn’t make me a little sad… also can’t say I didn’t smile to think of it.

  2. Ahhhh I totally had this happen to me once! A girl I dated when I was a teenager. At the time, she was smoking hot. Huge boobs, great, soccer player legs, a stunning figure all around, and the most dazzling green eyes I’d ever seen. Alas, we were super young and her dad hated me thoroughly. I was the poor punk biker messing with his very wealthy entitled daddy’s girl. His money won out.

    Many, many years later, I was sitting on a bench at the local mall while my (now ex) wife was shopping for shoes, when I hear someone shout my name excitedly. I look up, and this woman comes running towards me. I have no idea who she is. She’s very, very large and starts rambling on and on like we are best friends…and yes, doing more than a bit of flirting. And then I look at her eyes. Here eyes that are like emeralds laced with gold. I gasped, and did the most ungentlemanly thing I’ve ever done in my life.

    “Jody?!?” I said, interrupting her conversation with me. I could tell immediately the hurt in her eyes, and god, to this day I feel bad about that. I was just so shocked, she looked SO different that I literally couldn’t tell it was her, save that I’d never seen anyone with her colored eyes before.

    Thankfully, I was able to stumble my way through and excuse myself, claiming I was super tired (not a lie) from my night job and had just been lost in thought. My ex came out then, and it was instant bitch face time, so Jody left. I ran into her again at a party a couple years later and was much nicer. But damned, it was just a shocking change.

What do you think?