As I mentioned before, I’m prepping my six-year-old son for Johnny Id’s visit in under two weeks.
The first conversation was me telling him how Johnny was a special friend.
I have been thinking a lot about what I will do about the sleeping arrangements for the couple of nights that my son will be with me when Johnny is here. I decided I’d really like it if Johnny slept in my bed those nights. But I also want to make sure my son was okay with it, and it doesn’t feel weird for him.
In contrast, my ex says that despite dating Colleen for a year now, she has never slept in his bed while my son is there. She comes over with her girls and they all sleep in the pull out couch in
my his office. I’m not sure what the right approach is, but I think it lies somewhere between having sex openly in front of your children, and hiding all affection from one’s child.
Although he sleeps in his own bed, my son has a habit of occasionally getting up at 5am and wandering down the hall to my room. I don’t kick him out. I like it and since the time will go by so quickly, I don’t worry about it. And anyway, there’s nothing better than waking up to “Mummy can I tell you something important….I love you”.
So here’s how our conversation went.
- Me: Honey, remember Johnny who we were talking about yesterday?
- Him: Yes Mummy.
- Me: Well, as you know, he’s a special friend of mine. I wanted to know how you would feel if when he was here, he slept with me in my bed.
- Him: What about if I get up in the middle of the night and want to sleep in your bed?
- Me: That would be fine. I know that Johnny wouldn’t mind if you came into my bed when he was there.
- Him: Would I need to squeeze in between the two of you? Would he go and sleep on the floor?
- Me: I am not making him sleep on the floor. If you or he were uncomfortable, then when you come into my bed, he can go sleep in yours.
- Him: I don’t think, so, Mummy. I don’t want him to be in the bed with you and me.
- Me: Why not?
- Him: I don’t want to sleep with a hairy man.
We giggled our heads off together.
Johnny would probably get upset if I didn’t clarify that he is not particularly hairy. We have skyped a couple of times when my son was around, and he’s never shown off any chest hair. So where he got this idea, I have no clue.
My son comes first, of course, but the thought of not being able to sleep in Johnny’s arms every night we are together, feels a bit torturous.
I’m still working on figuring out what to do. Will probably just see how it goes.
Image Source: http://getssweeterwithtime.blogspot.ca/2012/03/you-might-be-undateable-if.html