My giant…loses his livelihood (#4)

Continued from My Giant…Escalates

As he plans our date, asking me what kinds of things I like to do and what kind of food I like, he proves out how considerate he can be.  Knowing I have a 5 year-old, as he is researching things to do (he’s relatively new to the city in which he lives), he finds interesting things for children to do in the area and sends me a bunch of links.

He’s also sent me a few eCards, some YouTube videos of things he thinks I and/or my son would enjoy, and book recommendations.  He’s obviously thinking about me a lot – and this feels really nice.  My ex was someone who gave expensive gifts – and that is the one “love language” that means very little to me.  My Giant was a giver – of words, deeds, and time.  It was a lovely change.  The eCards were a bit over the top but I tried to not let my inner cynic get the best of me.

We got more comfortable with the notion that we would be spending the evening together.  Instead of battling to have a conversation in a noisy bar, he suggested we have a picnic in the room – charcuterie, cheese, bread, wine.  That’s my favorite meal and I was thrilled he suggested it.

But then.

On Thursday morning, he texts me to tell me that he is now out of work.  His contract has been ended because they were shutting that office down, and he would need to travel about an hour away.  His car is busted and there is no public transit for him to reasonably get there.  I ask him why not just take his car into the shop and he tells me it will cost him $400 to do so.  It strikes me that this should not be a huge deal…if the option is spend some money versus lose your job, even if it’s a contract, it doesn’t make sense.  But the reality is, he can’t drive anyway, because of his knee.  I realize now just how tight his money must be, and I’m a little uncomfortable.

Our conversation went like this:

  • Him: I wouldn’t blame you though if you wanted to run the other way.
  • Me: That’s the last thing you should worry about.
  • Him: I still would like to meet you but I also understand if you’d like to change your mind.
  • Me: And why would I do that? If I thought you were permanently unemployed, underemployed, or unemployable, that would be different. I have no reason to think those things at this point.
  • Him: You don’t know how much that means to me right now. I’ll manage somehow, I always do, but it’s nice to have a cheerleader. Thanks for being so kind, it speaks volumes about your character.
  • Me: Thanks for saying that…it’s just how I am.
  • Him: If you can accept someone at their worst then you’re definitely deserving of their best.
  • Me: I can tell you 100% that your news today has no impact on my wanting to talk to you face to face… Experience you in full 3D… Determine whether what I hope to be the case, is the case. We can never know what next week or next month or next year will bring. So I would be foolish to not take an opportunity to meet you. I like what I know so far.
  • Him: You’re going to make me cry. Lol where did you come from? 🙂  Honestly, I can’t seem to help feeling like I’ve somehow let you down. My own worst critic I guess.

I sense his ego and mojo and confidence have been wiped away with a single event.

What the heck was it going to be like on Friday night?

[Part Five]

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