Continued from My Giant…Communicates
Our conversations continued throughout my trip (during which I had no sex whatsoever…thank goodness for my vibe). He was bold and confident:
“Well it’s hard to discuss such things without seeming immodest. I am an ENTJ personality, an alpha, I project power, prowess and animal magnetism. People sometimes tell me they feel like I’m looking through them. I can walk practically anywhere I want at any time. King of the jungle baby! Lol.”
For whatever reason, it didn’t come across as arrogance.
We talked about meeting up. He was concerned about his knee surgery and when he would be able to drive. I offered to drive to him.
He asked if I was on Facebook. I’ve never, ever given someone I’m dating access to my Facebook page. It has years of stuff with my son, my ex, my friends. Only actual friends are connected with me – I never pursued friend numbers to bolster my ego. So I was a little taken aback and told him such – he said he understood why I wouldn’t be comfortable sharing (but after our first meeting, I did accept his friend request). We did connect on LinkedIn, which I had done before and I find a good measure of whether someone is who they say they are. In his case, it all panned out.
While away, I sent him a photo of my tan lines (not naked…), and learned more about his background. We established we were both looking for similar things in our next relationships. It turns out that 99% match seemed to be pretty accurate, the more we texted.
We agreed to meet the weekend after I returned from my vacation. His car was in need of repair and he’s a do-it-yourself kind of guy and was waiting for the snow to recede. I couldn’t imagine not having a car, given where he lived, but I was fine to drive and was exceedingly excited to meet him.
It wasn’t all communication by text…we also spoke on the phone. The first “real” time (drunk after the sports game doesn’t count) we spoke for 4 hours. The next night was 2 hours, and the same the night after that. The last time I’d had that kind of first phone call with someone was my ex-husband. I was nervous and excited at the same time. Although his voice wasn’t what I expected, and at times he seemed to enjoy monologues more than dialogue, I ignored those little things given everything else was so awesome. I know how quick I am to judge, and I’m keenly aware of giving people a real fighting chance.
Our flirting escalated. We discussed the potential sleeping arrangements the night I was coming to visit. Knowing that not being stupid is really important, I decided to rent a hotel room. This gave me an out in case over dinner I decided he wasn’t for me. It also meant I could have a fun time with him if he chose to come back to the hotel with me. He said he was nervous about the thought of having sex with me the first time we met in person – not because he wouldn’t want to, but because:
- Him: I wouldn’t want you to look at me differently the next day 🙁
- Me: Why would I?
- Him: It happens, women often get all excited then the next day guilt sets in.
- Me: Not that you asked but I will tell you anyway. Physical compatibility is exceedingly important to me. Just like mental. I honestly prefer to find out sooner rather than later if the physical is there as well. I have no such guilt of which you speak. None.
- Him: Good to know. I’ve never had complaints in the physicality dept. I just really like you and if that happened, if things were all hot and steamy then the next day you got quiet or weird I’d be really crushed.
- Me: Promise. Not going to happen. The quiet and weird.
- Him: Time will tell. Ok, as long as you keep your promise. It’s happened to me before and it left me feeling used and lousy.
Gosh he was sensitive too? Hurt by women in the past who used him just for sex? I saw no red flags, only positives.
Could it actually be that I’ve met my match?