The reality is that it feels darn good when young dudes reach out online. Turning 40 right after I became single, while not inherently traumatic, did make me think about my age and the time that has passed. I look better now than I did at 30 – I may have more wrinkles, but I’m in better shape. But gravity has its effects and skin just doesn’t look as good and perhaps some things aren’t as perky as they used to be.
So…when I went online at first, it was really to get my mojo back and start to feel attractive and desirable again. Which admittedly should come within, but if I’m the only person who wants to have sex with me, that would suck. I expected to hear from guys my age and older. I’ve been shocked at the number of young guys who have come knocking….and they’ve said some awesome things.
Most in their emails say that I’m beautiful, hot, cute…all the standard physical phrases. As I write this a 20 year old’s messages are streaming in – he opened with “you look awesome!”. One 23 year old told me he “would be the best lover [I’d] ever had”. I didn’t have the heart to tell him there was NO WAY that would be possible. Now, you may be asking yourself whether I have dabbled with any of these young laddies. The answer is: with some – and I have several thoughts on the matter that I will definitely write about. When I ask why the interest, their answers are quite consistent. But more on that later.
Of course, the best compliments have been in person. Not because they were the most flattering (guys online can get very graphic, as you know), but perhaps because I tended to believe they were honest. One came from a 27 year old who told me…after seeing and touching them…”you have tits like a 25 year old”. I guess he would know. I also received many from a 30 year old who I have seen on multiple occasions. His infuriating shenanigans are worthy of several blog entries. The last time I saw him, I greeted him in a trenchcoat, thong, and high heels. As I walked to get a couple glasses of wine, he said “remind me, do you work out? Because your legs look awesome.”
So yes, while I know feelings of self worth should absolutely come from within, I can safely say that some young guys think I’m hot. And that feels terrific.